IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Technology has mostly benefits or mostly disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

With the development of society,
technology
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 plays a significant role in our
life
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lives
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. When it comes to
technology
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, people’s opinions vary.
While
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 a segment of society argues that the advantages of
technology
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 outweigh its drawbacks, others hold the contrasting view that. As for me, I side with the former. On the one hand,
technology
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 has a substantial number of benefits
varying
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, varying
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 from education to communication.
Firstly
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, Artificial Intelligence exerts an impact on education. From the perspective of our students, AI not only improves the efficiency of gathering information
,
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apply
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 but
also
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 diminishes the unfairness between urban and rural areas.
For instance
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, students from remote villages can receive high-quality courses through AI education platforms, which are usually only available for students in cities.
Besides
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, the appearance of social media has greatly narrowed the gap between people, allowing individuals separated by long
distance
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distances
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 to communicate in real time.
Therefore
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,
technology
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 does more good than harm.
On the other hand
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, the disadvantages of
technology
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 cannot be underestimated. As we all know, it is AI
that is
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 gradually replacing some of humans’ jobs, which means a large number of people are now facing employment problems.
In addition
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, relying excessively on electronic products can lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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health problems like neck illness. In my opinion,
technology
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 is undoubtedly more beneficial than harmful. What lies at the heart of the unemployment problem is
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of skills rather than the replacement of AI.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, regarding the overuse of electronic products, people ought to enhance their self-discipline rather than
blaming
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blindly blaming technology
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technology
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 blindly. In conclusion,
technology
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 is a double-edged sword. If we make proper
utilization
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utilisation
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 of it,
technology
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 can bring us more benefits.」

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task response
Make a clear start by saying you will look at both sides and give your view.
coherence
Use more linking words to show flow, like 'also', 'however', and 'in addition'.
clarity
Write each point with one clear example and stay on topic.
grammar
Fix grammar and small errors to avoid odd phrases.
structure
End with a short conclusion that restates your view.
stance
The writer shows a real view and not just talk.
content
Examples about AI in education and social media show ideas.
structure
The conclusion shows a view of balance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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