IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

“Some people believe that children should be given homework every day, while others argue that homework is unnecessary and that children should spend more time playing and relaxing. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.”

Different people argue that
children
Use synonyms
 must
be handled
Wrong verb form
handle
show examples
 homework on a daily basis,
while
Linking Words
 others
thinl
Correct your spelling
think
 that it is not a requirement,but
instead
Linking Words
 they need to have
time
Use synonyms
 for themselves to relax and enjoy. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I’ll discuss both perspectives and give my final thought. On the one hand, giving students tasks
everyday
Use the right word
every day
show examples
 can help with their academic progress. If students are given daily
tasks
Punctuation problem
tasks,
show examples
 they will be more familiar with the type of questions they might face in exams.
In addition
Linking Words
, practice makes perfect,so
failling
Correct your spelling
failing
 in homework will reduce the
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of mistakes during the
acctual
Correct your spelling
actual
 exam. Stress can
also
Linking Words
 affect the results of the test, so being used to
solve
Wrong verb form
solving
show examples
 problems will
decline
Verb problem
decrease
show examples
 the amount of stress. As an example, at many
schools
Add a comma
schools,
show examples
 there is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
special care for students with lower grades,and most of the
time
Use synonyms
you
Punctuation problem
, you
show examples
 can see a noticeable change in their grades after the extra hours of practice.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, allowing
children
Use synonyms
 to enjoy their free
time
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
have it is
Wrong verb form
has its
show examples
 own benefit.
Children
Use synonyms
 are not robots. You can’t force them into finishing the academic requirements
everyday
Use the right word
every day
show examples
. Having their own
time
Use synonyms
 to relax and enjoy will reduce the amount of pressure on them,and
this
Linking Words
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
can not be
achived
Correct your spelling
achieved
 if they are always busy with academic tasks. Days off must be offered as a solution. It will become less stressful for them to do their homework when they have their own
time
Use synonyms
 to enjoy later. As an example,many therapists
advice
Replace the word
advise
show examples
 parent to give their
children
Use synonyms
 their own
time
Use synonyms
 of joy,because it has an impact on their mental health and daily life. In conclusion,I
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
 that it is highly important to find a balanced
life style
Use the right word
lifestyle
show examples
 between the two,because it’s important to give
children
Use synonyms
 their own free
time
Use synonyms
 without forgetting the need to make academic progress.

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grammar
Fix spelling and grammar to make ideas clear. For example, use 'every day' instead of 'everyday', and spell 'actual' correctly.
coherence
Use short, simple sentences and clear links. This helps the flow of ideas.
structure
State your view clearly in the start and restate it in the end.
task
Give one strong example for each view to show your point.
grammar
Check marks and commas to toon the text so it is easy to read.
structure
Two sides are shown with 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand'.
content
There is a clear view in the conclusion.
content
The main idea is easy to see.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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