IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Biotechnology companies all over the world are developing different types of genetically modified (GM) crops. However, not enough is known about these crops on our health and the environment. Interfering with nature in this way should be prohibited. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Genetically modified
crops
Use synonyms
 are
producing
Wrong verb form
being produced
show examples
 by biotech companies all over the world
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 there is
no
Rephrase
apply
show examples
sufficient
Use the right word
insufficient
show examples
 information about them.
Therefore
Linking Words
, there is a way of thinking that they should not be allowed. I believe there are both pros and cons
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 issue. First of all, the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of
devoloping
Correct your spelling
developing
 genetically modified
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 was for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good intentions. The major reason was
prevention
Correct article usage
the prevention
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 famine and
increasing
Wrong verb form
the increase
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of
Change preposition
in
show examples
productivity
Correct article usage
the productivity
show examples
 of
crops
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, biotechnology companies have developed genetically modified
crops
Use synonyms
 and
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
 them more resistant to diseases and
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of insects. Actually,
this
Linking Words
 idea
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 beneficial and productivity has
been
Verb problem
apply
show examples
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, there is
no
Rephrase
apply
show examples
sufficient
Use the right word
insufficient
show examples
 data and information on
Correct article usage
the enviroment
show examples
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 and our health.
For
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 reason,
Correct article usage
the mojority
show examples
mojority
Correct your spelling
majority
 of people claim that genetically modified
crops
Use synonyms
 are unhealthy and they may
harmful
Verb problem
be harmful
show examples
 for the
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 as well. I believe
this
Linking Words
 idea
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 some true points. The plants became more resistant and unpredictable as well.
While
Linking Words
 the
crops
Use synonyms
 can
prevent
Verb problem
protect
show examples
 from insects, it can cause huge unbalance
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, since
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
crops
Use synonyms
 are not past more than
couple
Correct article usage
a couple
show examples
 of decades, it is not impossible to predict their effects on our health in the future. In conclusion,
beside of
Change preposition
besides
show examples
 the first intention of the idea of developing genetically modified
crops
Use synonyms
 were good,
unpredictable
Correct article usage
the unpredictable
show examples
 future effects are concerning.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I believe
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
crops
Use synonyms
 should be prohibited all over the world.

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structure
Strengthen your thesis by clearly stating your position in the opening sentence and keep it consistent.
content
Develop each idea with specific examples or evidence, and explain how it supports your view.
grammar
Check grammar and word choice. Use simple words correctly; fix common errors (their/there/they’re, affect/effect, these).
cohesion
Improve coherence by using linking words to show cause, result, and contrast.
argument
Clear position against GM crops is stated.
structure
Intro and conclusion are present.
cohesion
Some linking words and logical order used.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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