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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that children should not go to school unti; they are older. discuss both views and give your opinion.

Admitting kids to an academic academy at
a
Correct article usage
the
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 right moment has become a pressing issue in many countries.
While
Linking Words
 some contend that kids should attend at a very young
moment
Check wording
age
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, others argue that they should not go to an academic institution until they are mature enough.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both perspectives and present my viewpoint as well. In order to teach
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and learn knowledge, guardians have to admit their offspring to an institution
, some
Punctuation problem
. Some
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 believe that
this
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 should be done as early as possible, as it has numerous benefits. First and foremost, it is the
moment saving
Use the right word
moment-saving
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 because
youngsters
Use synonyms
 who start earlier accelerate, become more equipped in terms of knowledge than those who
got
Wrong verb form
get
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 admitted later.
For instance
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, I am currently the youngest one in my university batch
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I can achieve success at a younger stage compared to my companions.
Secondly
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, parents can do their work easily
,
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apply
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 when their child is at kindergarten, as they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 have to spend their precious hours teaching their child about distinct things
such
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 as
Correct article usage
the alphabets
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alphabets
Fix the agreement mistake
alphabet
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,
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apply
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 and numbers.
On the contrary
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, opponents argue that guardians should try to delay
admission
Correct article usage
the admission
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 process until the kid
reach
Correct subject-verb agreement
reaches
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 an appropriate stage.
Such
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approach
Correct article usage
an approach
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 makes things easier for parents and
youngsters
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, parents can spend more
moments
Check wording
time
show examples
 with their kids, and
can-do
Use the right word
can do
show examples
 basic parenting themselves, and teach them about cultural, social values.
For example
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, I learnt basic
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
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 of writing, reading and speaking from my grandfather; he told me about valuable cultural aspects too.
On the other hand
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,
youngsters
Use synonyms
 can manage their routines, and will be able to communicate
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 different
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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. In light of the above facts, I admit that
youngsters
Use synonyms
 should start at a very early stage,
whereas
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 I believe that they should not go to an institution until
;
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 they are older.

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clarity
Your stance is not clear at the end. State one view and stick to it in the end.
development
Give one strong example for each idea to show you can argue well.
coherence
Use simple link words to join ideas, like 'first', 'also', 'but', 'however', 'in addition'.
grammar
Check grammar and fix errors like 'until;' and missing apostrophes.
structure
Make each paragraph deal with one main idea.
effort
You try to deal with both sides.
strength
You give a personal example.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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