IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

As a part of their education, many students work at a company for short period of time without a salary. What are the advantage and disadvantage to doing this?

Society has drastically changed from the past
especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
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 education. Some students face difficulty
at
Change preposition
in
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 balancing their studies and their experiences.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it might make them fail at their studies or
pass
Punctuation problem
pass,
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depends
Wrong verb form
depending
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 on the person's hard
work
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will explain
about
Change preposition
apply
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the advantages and the disadvantages
about
Change preposition
of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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students
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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work
Use synonyms
 at a company for a short period of time without getting paid. There are many advantages
about
Change preposition
to
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 working in a company as a student.
First,
Linking Words
they will
get
Verb problem
gain
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many
Fix the agreement mistake
much
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 experience working there.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it helps them build
connection
Fix the agreement mistake
connections
show examples
 with people of the same
feild
Correct your spelling
field
.
Third,
Linking Words
it
prepairs
Correct your spelling
prepares
 them to focus on their
work
Use synonyms
 if they are busy.
Lastly
Linking Words
, it makes them a
depandable
Correct your spelling
dependable
 person. There are many disadvantages of working as a student. To start with, it
waste
Correct subject-verb agreement
wastes
show examples
 their time by doing other
work
Use synonyms
 than studying.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it might make them
depresed
Correct your spelling
depressed
 by not fitting
at
Change preposition
in at
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 the company because of their young age.
Also
Linking Words
, people working there might look down on them if they make some mistakes.
Finally
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,
student
Correct article usage
a student
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 might fail at school because of not balancing between
work
Use synonyms
 and school. In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, everything has
it's
Use the right word
its
show examples
 own cons and pros
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 the secret is to know how to deal with them. As for working
while
Linking Words
Correct your spelling
studying
studing
Punctuation problem
studing,
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 it is hard to do
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 focusing on how to
work
Use synonyms
 with them is the key.

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task response
Give a clear view of both sides. State your own view at the end.
coherence and cohesion
Use order in your essay. Start with one idea, then add another. Use words like first, next, and finally.
task response
The essay shows the idea of both pros and cons.
coherence and cohesion
There is a real mix of ideas and some good linking words.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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