IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 word

People don't have the ability to protect the
environment
Use synonyms
,
conversely
Linking Words
 with the institutional authorities and other big firms.
This
Linking Words
 essay strongly
disagree
Correct subject-verb agreement
disagrees
show examples
 with
this
Linking Words
 view; I believe that every person can
play as
Verb problem
make
show examples
 a major contribution in the process of protecting nature, and that by mitigating the
use
Use synonyms
 of
plastics
Use synonyms
,
in addition
Linking Words
 to
refraing
Correct your spelling
refraining
 the
use
Use synonyms
 of a fuel-powered car. Reducing the
rate
Check wording
use
show examples
 of
using
Verb problem
apply
show examples
plastics
Use synonyms
 can help the
environment
Use synonyms
 effectively. Every person can help the
environment
Use synonyms
 by avoiding
utilise
Verb problem
using
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
plastics
Use synonyms
, which
stay
Verb problem
do
show examples
 without
decomposing
Wrong verb form
decompose
show examples
 for a long time
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
the low
Correct determiner usage
Low
show examples
demands
Fix the agreement mistake
demand
show examples
 will force
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
companies to lower
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
production.
For example
Linking Words
, a recent study by BBC shows that the major harmful reason for environmental issues is
plastics
Use synonyms
 compared to
others
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
 problems as it
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 so many effects on the creatures and plants, and the
lower
Correct word choice
less
show examples
 we
use
Use synonyms
 it
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 more we
heal
Verb problem
help
show examples
 the
environment
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, refraining
of utilize
Change preposition
from utilising
show examples
 vehicles is considered another major factor that
preserve
Correct subject-verb agreement
preserves
show examples
 nature. The refraining process can help the
environment
Use synonyms
 and stop Global Warming by reducing carbon dioxide in the sky.
For instance
Linking Words
, a recent study by Green Saudi shows that places with
low
Correct article usage
a low
show examples
 rate of cars have a low
tempeture
Correct your spelling
temperature
 and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
clean air,
in contrast
Linking Words
 with places with a high rate of cars. In conclusion, I disagree with the view that says a single person cannot do anything to conserve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature. By lowering the
use
Use synonyms
 of cars and
rely
Wrong verb form
relying
show examples
 on alternative
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
plastics
Use synonyms
 , we can conserve and save the
environment
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Be clear on your view from the start and keep it in every part of the essay.
task achievement
Give more detail for each idea and explain why it matters. Use simple facts or examples that are true and clear.
coherence
Use more linking words to show how ideas connect, and be careful with pronoun and sentence links.
coherence
Fix grammar and word choice. Use short, simple sentences and correct common errors.
task achievement
Keep to 2-3 strong ideas, and end with a clear conclusion that matches your view.
content
Clear view on the topic.
structure
Less wordy intro and conclusion.
content
Examples show cause and effect idea.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: