The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram illustrates the process of producing
sugar
Use synonyms
from
sugar
Use synonyms
cane, beginning with cultivation and ending with drying and cooling.
Overall
Linking Words
,
sugar
Use synonyms
production
contains
Verb problem
consists
show examples
of seven main stages, starting with the growth and harvest of the
sugar
Use synonyms
canes and culminating in the drying of the
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals to obtain the final product. In the first stage,
sugar
Use synonyms
cane is cultivated
12
Change preposition
for 12
show examples
-18 months until it is ready for harvest. The crop can be collected either manually, using workers or mechanically, with harvesting machines.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
,
sugar
Use synonyms
canes
crushed
Verb problem
are crushed
show examples
to extract their juice. The extracted liquid is
then
Linking Words
purified by passing it through a limestone filter.
Next
Add a comma
Next,
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the filtered juice is heated in an evaporator, where it is transformed into syrup.
This
Linking Words
syrup undergoes centrifugation, which separates the
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals from
remaining
Correct article usage
the remaining
show examples
liquid.
Finally
Linking Words
, the
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals are dried and cooled, and at
this
Linking Words
stage
Punctuation problem
stage,
show examples
the manufacturing process is complete, producing the refined
sugar
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
ready for everyday use.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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