IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

1.⁠ ⁠Long distance flight consumes the amount of fuel that a car uses for many years and pollutes the air. Some people think that we should discourage non-essential flights, such as tourists travel, rather than limit the use of cars. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is an
argued
Replace the word
argument
show examples
 that some
people
Use synonyms
 think that the flights are the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 and we should use the
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
 only for important reasons and limit the use of cars.
This
Linking Words
 essay
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
totlly
Correct your spelling
totally
disagree
Correct subject-verb agreement
disagrees
show examples
, because in my opinion, travel the
tourists
Use synonyms
 by
the airplans
Check wording
air
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 crucial because it helps to
rise
Use the right word
raise
show examples
 the
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 of the
countries
Use synonyms
,
also
Linking Words
 we have to consider that there are many other reasons for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
. Many
countries
Use synonyms
 depend on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourists
Use synonyms
 to
financial
Replace the word
finance
show examples
 the
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
countries
Use synonyms
. Stop the flights for these
countries
Use synonyms
 will harm the community
as a result
Linking Words
 of stop the flights. It will harm the community by
stop
Wrong verb form
stopping
show examples
 the government tha salaries, which means
people
Use synonyms
 will suffer to find money to buy food and
basics
Fix the agreement mistake
basic
show examples
 things. A study has shown the
mentalhealth
Correct your spelling
mental health
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who had
difficult
Replace the word
difficulty
show examples
to get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
 money because of
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 salaries and the
difficults
Correct your spelling
difficulties
to find
Change preposition
in finding
show examples
 the main sources to keep them
a live
Use the right word
alive
show examples
, the
Punctuation problem
. The
show examples
 results of the study were
most
Correct word choice
that most
show examples
 of those
people
Use synonyms
 have a bad mental health because of
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 salaries. The
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
 and cars
not
Verb problem
are not
show examples
 the only
reson
Correct your spelling
reason
 for the
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
, but
also
Linking Words
 the
factors
Fix the agreement mistake
factor
show examples
smoke
Change preposition
of smoke
show examples
 is the most
popular
Correct word choice
common
show examples
 reason for
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
. There are a lot of factors around the world
Use synonyms
Correct word choice
that thier
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 work depends on burning items to make
extremly
Correct your spelling
extremely
 important items that we
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
use
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in our daily
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
,
for example
Linking Words
, plates and
furntures
Correct your spelling
furniture
. A study has shown that the
primery
Correct your spelling
primary
 reason for 60% of
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 was the factories. In conclusion, using the
airplane
Change the spelling
aeroplane
show examples
 to trans
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourists
Use synonyms
 is essential for many
countries
Use synonyms
, because
tourists
Use synonyms
 are the main source
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 financial
these
Change preposition
for these
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
. There is no denying the fact
that
Linking Words
is
Correct pronoun usage
it is
show examples
 impossible to stop
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 by
stop using
Wrong verb form
stopping the use of
show examples
 cars and
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 other reasons for
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
, but we can reduce the impact by
educate
Wrong verb form
educating
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 about the harm of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Plan your answer before you write. Start with a clear yes or no at the start and say your main idea in one line.
coherence
Put one main idea in each paragraph. Begin with a topic sentence that links to your view.
content
Add real and exact examples. Do not only say 'a study' without a clear source.
language
Watch spelling and grammar. Fix common errors like 'airplanes' and 'tourists'.
coherence
Use linking words to move from one idea to the next, such as 'also', 'but', 'therefore'.
language
Use simple words and keep long sentences short to be easy to read.
idea
Your view is clear and you take a stand.
content
You point out the role of travel for jobs and money.
content
You acknowledge other sources of air pollution.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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