IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people think that government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could better spend elsewhere.To what extent do you agree with the view?

It is thought by the few that the authorities
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
fritteting
Correct your spelling
frittering
 income on the crafts,
instead
Linking Words
 it can be used for other productive things. In my opinion, I disagree that
public
Correct article usage
the public
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 sector should
neglate
Correct your spelling
neglect
 the public talent, they should be valued
equal
Replace the word
equally
show examples
 as other
athlets
Correct your spelling
athletes
.
Firstly
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, the main reason why I believe that performing
art
Fix the agreement mistake
arts
show examples
 should be given importance
Verb problem
is becuase
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becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 they play a role in bringing pride to
country
Correct article usage
the country
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 through craftsmanship.
For instance
Linking Words
, by participating in
talent
Correct article usage
a talent
show examples
 show
competition
Punctuation problem
competition,
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 they can display unique crafts of their country.
Secondly
Linking Words
, another point to be
consider
Wrong verb form
considered
show examples
 is that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Investing
Fix capitalization
investing
show examples
 in the arts has economic benefits and can generate revenue.
For example
Linking Words
,
In
Fix capitalization
in
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India
Add a comma
India,
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 the creative embroidery on clothing is very famous and there is
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
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 of exports from India to other
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 results in
Correct article usage
an increase
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increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
 economy.
Finally
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, investing funds in creativity will
benifit
Correct your spelling
benefit
 the nation in
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
 run, as it will encourage other individuals to
has
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 their own craft talent even if they think there is no income in it. In Conclusion, I disagree that
state
Correct article usage
the state
show examples
 should avoid spending money on
arts
Correct article usage
the arts
show examples
, if
Punctuation problem
. If
show examples
 they show interest by investing
money
Punctuation problem
money,
show examples
then
Linking Words
 it will bring
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
 to the territory.

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task response
Plan before writing: state your position in the opening sentence, outline two main ideas, and sum up in the conclusion.
coherence
Make your argument clear and logical: each paragraph should have one idea with a supporting example.
grammar
Use simple grammar: check subject-verb forms and articles; avoid long run-on sentences.
lexical
Examples should be accurate and relevant; avoid facts you cannot support in the essay.
structure
Finish with a strong conclusion restating your view.
stance
The writer takes a clear position against cutting funds to the arts.
content
Some ideas link arts to pride and economy.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
What to do next:
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