Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

It is often said that
music
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helps
people
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from different cultures and age groups to connect with one another. I completely agree with
this
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statement because
music
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allows
people
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to share emotions and understand each other better, no matter where they come from. First of all,
music
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plays an important role in joining
people
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from various cultural backgrounds. When
people
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attend international concerts or listen to global
music
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platforms, they get a chance to experience the traditions and emotions of other societies.
For example
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, many
people
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around the world enjoy songs from other countries even if they do not understand the language.
This
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shows that
music
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has a universal power that helps
people
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build cultural understanding and friendship.
Secondly
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,
music
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is
also
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a good way to connect
people
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of different ages. Both young and old
people
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often listen to the same songs or perform together during family gatherings or community events.
This
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creates harmony and emotional bonding among them.
For instance
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, when parents and children sing or dance together, it helps them relax and communicate better. In conclusion, I strongly believe that
music
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is a great way to bring
people
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closer, regardless of their age or cultural background. It allows them to share feelings, understand each other, and create positive relationships in society.

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task response
In the opening, state a clear view and how far you agree. Your start says you completely agree; add a line on how strong you think this is.
task response
Give more depth to each point. Add more detail or a second example for each idea to show why music helps people from more than one side.
coherence
Keep one main idea in each paragraph. Add a paragraph for a counter view if you wish to show balance.
coherence
Link ideas with tidy words like 'also', 'for example', 'therefore' to show how your words go well together.
task response
Avoid extra lines that do not help the task. Make each sentence count toward answering the question.
task response
End with a strong final sentence that restates your view and what music can do for people.
response
Clear stance at the start and a closing line that repeats your view.
coherence
Good use of sign posts like 'First of all' and 'Secondly' to show order.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
What to do next:
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