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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many students graduate high school and wish to continue studying in another country. Give the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad.

The world and society have greatly changed
Punctuation problem
,
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and that includes education. Nowadays, many students graduating from high school dream of continuing their studies in a different country .
This
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 could be a way to open new doors for their future life in terms of jobs and stability.
However
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, it
also
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 carries many perils.
This
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 essay will outline the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad. On the one hand, studying abroad has incredible advantages .
Firstly
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 , it gives the
student
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 the experience of studying abroad and having a new life .
For example
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, changes like a new house , friends and a new lifestyle.
Secondly
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, so many
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students
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student
Use synonyms
 are more mature and responsible when they are in a different country . They depend on themselves more and do not need any family support.
Finally
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, it gives amazing benefits for people in terms of education and access to high-ranked universities .
For instance
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, Harvard University is one of the best in the world .
On the other hand
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 , there are several disadvantages . First , numerous students could experience depression or homesickness. They may find it difficult to adapt to a new environment.
For instance
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, they might have trouble adapting to new weather.
In addition
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 , many countries that indeed have the best universities in the world could
also
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 be located in very unsafe cities. Crimes and robbery may be a real problem.
For example
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, a young
student
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 from one of the best universities in was recently murdered right next to her campus . In conclusion, it is clear to see that there are plenty of benefits to studying abroad .
However
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, there are
also
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 multiple disadvantages that students could experience .
Therefore
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, it is a personal decision a
student
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 must make.

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structure
Plan your work. Start with a short intro that says what you will talk about. Then give two clear points for each side, and end with a short conclusion that repeats your main idea.
language
Use easy word that we all know. Keep form and idea simple. Use clear links like and, but, however, for example to join ideas.
grammar
Check grammar and form. Fix mistakes like student vs students, in the world, punctuation, and spaces. Read aloud to hear how it sounds.
content
Clear idea of the topic and a plan to show both sides.
content
Use of examples, like Harvard, to back up a point.
structure
A clear 'On the one hand' / 'On the other hand' layout shows a plan.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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