IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 modern
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
time
Punctuation problem
time,
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 many people around the world now go to the supermarket to buy their daily groceries and
goods
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
usually
comes
Correct subject-verb agreement
come
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 from different places
of
Change preposition
around
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 the world.
Although
Linking Words
 buying massively from the supermarket market can have some disadvantages on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
i
Fix capitalization
I
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belive
Use the right word
believe
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 that its
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 far outweigh its drawbacks. First of all, having a place where people can easily find
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of foods and things is very convenient for the individual. As they can get their desired products
according to
Linking Words
 their different taste, culture and age.
Linking Words
Secondly
Add a comma
Secondly,
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due to
Linking Words
 the competitive global markets the consumers can have those imported
goods
Use synonyms
 comparatively at a cheaper price.
Again
Punctuation problem
Again,
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 they do need to visit multiple places for their daily needs
as
Punctuation problem
, as
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 they can access those
in
Change preposition
on
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 one platform.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
grobal
Correct your spelling
global
 trend of trading
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
 and
goods
Use synonyms
 can boost the economy significantly by creating more job sectors and
also
Linking Words
 supporting distant industries and agriculture. Another point is that
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
increasing the number in the export sector of any country
also
Linking Words
 helps to
rise
Use the right word
raise
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 the economic growth.
Linking Words
Therefore
Punctuation problem
Therefore,
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 it is advantageous in both economic sectors and
also
Linking Words
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social development.
However
Linking Words
, there are some disadvantages as the foods and
goods
Use synonyms
 travel a long distance to reach the supermarket,
thus
Linking Words
contributes
Wrong verb form
contributing
show examples
 to more carbon emissions and environmental degradation.
Linking Words
Also
Punctuation problem
Also,
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 sometimes supermarkets prioritise imported
goods
Use synonyms
 over local ones can
make
Verb problem
have
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 negative influences on the local farmers and economies. Another point is
sometimes
Correct word choice
that sometimes
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 the producer or the farmer doesn't get their fair share of subsidies because they can't get paid directly from the customer. So it is
importent
Correct your spelling
important
 to look upon their
wellbeing
Use the right word
well-being
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while
Linking Words
 keeping
price
Correct article usage
the price
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 in reach for the people and
also
Linking Words
 take some action to
minize
Correct your spelling
minimise
 the carbon footprint which is being created in
this
Linking Words
 process.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I
belive
Use the right word
believe
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 that having a dynamic
market place
Use the right word
marketplace
show examples
 like superstores is really beneficial for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 better future if some of the issues
resolve
Wrong verb form
are resolved
show examples
 cautiously.

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grammar
Fix spelling and form mistakes in the essay. Words like 'grobal', 'belive', 'importent' should be 'global', 'believe', 'important'. Use clear, simple spellings.
coherence
Use linking words to connect ideas. Start with 'First', 'Next', 'Also', 'However', 'Finally' to guide the reader.
task response
Give one or two clear examples to show a point. Do not repeat the same idea many times.
coherence
Keep a single idea in each paragraph and order your ideas in a clear way: introduction, reasons for benefit, drawbacks, and a short conclusion.
content
There are many ideas about how the topic affects the economy and the environment.
view
The writer shows a view that benefits may outweigh drawbacks.
structure
The essay is long enough and ends with a conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
What to do next:
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