Some people think young people should be free to choose their job, while others believe that they should be realistic and think about their future. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In recent years, the opportunity for young
people
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to choose their
job
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jobs
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has become a topic of heated debate. Some
people
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believe that
freedom
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can make young
people
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succeed,
while
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others argue that it may be
realistic
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unrealistic
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and think about their future.
This
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essay will discuss both views and present my own opinion. Supporters of
freedom
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can make young
people
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succeed and often argue that
freedom
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of choice can lead to creativity and enthusiasm. They claim that giving teenagers
free
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the freedom
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to choose their job causes adaptability and flexibility.
For instance
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, many young entrepreneurs start their own business and succeed because they follow their passion,
such
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as tech start-ups in Silicon Valley.
Therefore
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, it is understandable why some
people
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hold
this
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view.
On the other hand
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, proponents of young
people
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are necessary to face reality and argue that it may cause unemployment. They believe that
freedom
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of
choices
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choice
show examples
can make young
people
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decrease their
self- confidence
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self-confidence
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and lose
employee’s
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employees’
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trust.
For example
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, a lot of teenagers quit their jobs directly
,
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apply
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and decide to become an influencer,
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while
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but
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he
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they
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not only fail but
also
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lose their jobs.
Thus
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, it is clear why others support
this
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perspective. Personally, I am more inclined to agree with the former view. One reason is that
freedom
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of
choices
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choice
show examples
can foster creativity.
Additionally
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, freelancers can balance life and work flexibility, which can improve satisfaction. In my view, it is necessary to give the younger generation
freedom
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. In conclusion, both sides present compelling arguments regarding the opportunity for young
people
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to choose their
job
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jobs
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.
However
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, I believe that
freedom
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of
choices
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choice
show examples
can boost flexibility and creativity.

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task response
In your essay, talk about both views and your own opinion. Expand each idea with clear reason and connect it to the view.
coherence
Use more clear links between ideas. Put one big idea in each paragraph and use linking words to show reason, contrast, and result.
content
Check your facts and examples. Use examples that directly back your point and stay close to the meaning.
language
Watch grammar and word choice. Some phrases are not clear or wrong. Use simple, exact words.
structure
You state your view clearly in the end.
content
You present both sides of the issue.
content
Some good examples are given.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • career trajectory
  • job satisfaction
  • employment prospects
  • financial stability
  • job security
  • economically viable
  • harnessing potential
  • labor market
  • vocational guidance
  • real-world demands
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