IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people believe that advertising encourages unnecessary spending, while others argue that it provides useful information about new products and services. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Figs. 1A-C show tirzepatide in open regions of the brain, notably the area postrema and NTS, both linked to appetite control.
Then
Linking Words
 Figs. 2A-C point to activity in the NST, PBN and CeA, where GLP-1R and GIPR seem to act together there. Once GLP-1R is taken out of the brainstem (Fig. 3A-C), the effect fades, so these lower parts seem to drive the change. After that, Fig. 4A shows GIPR in red in the area postrema, close to GABA cells that
Verb problem
are quiet
show examples
quiet
Use the right word
quite
show examples
 nearby GLP-1R neurons.
Finally
Linking Words
, in the later Figures (5-7), the CeA is clearer; these cells tie to feeding centres, and when silent, the shared effect drops away, so the CeA feels like the core of it all.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

content
For task response, you should talk about both sides of the issue and give your own view. Add a clear plan at the start and a short end.
structure
For coherence, group ideas in clear parts. Use more link words like and, but, also, then. Make each part stay on one idea.
content
Make the points fit the task. Show how your idea connects to the prompt with simple, clear talk about the topic.
content
You use figure refs well and give exact data.
organization
Link words help move the thought from one part to the next.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: