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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Nowdays, the way people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationship people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

In the prevailing era,
technology
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 has made
people
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's lives comfortable.
Due to
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 the advent of new
technology
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,
people
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 have changed the way they communicate with each other.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the approaches in which their
relationships
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 are affected. I think
this
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 shift has mostly negative consequences.
Technology
Use synonyms
 has reshaped how
relationships
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 are formed and maintained. With the advent of social networking platforms,
such
Linking Words
 as Instagram, Facebook, and
Whatsapp
Use the right word
WhatsApp
show examples
,
people
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 can connect with others via video and audio calls, messaging, and many more.
For instance
Linking Words
, unlike the old days, individuals used to write letters, but
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
 can maintain their
relationships
Use synonyms
 with their overseas friends through instant messaging
,
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apply
show examples
 and video chats. I believe that the impact of
technology
Use synonyms
 on
relationships
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 is largely negative. Individuals prefer texting over face-to-face communication, and the warmth of
relationships
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 and empathy towards others have been declining
,
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apply
show examples
 over the years.
For example
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, if
people
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 get sick, their
neighbors
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neighbours
show examples
 usually ask about their health over the phone
instead
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 of visiting their home and asking about their needs.
To conclude
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, even though
technology
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 offers convenience and global connectivity
while
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 maintaining their
relationships
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, I believe that
this
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 phenomenon has enormous drawbacks since it intends to diminish
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social attraction.

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planning
Plan your essay. Say how tech changes talk, then say if this is good or bad, then end with a clear point.
examples
Add clear examples. Use simple details that show what you mean.
coherence
Link ideas with easy words like also, but, and so to show how ideas connect.
grammar
Check grammar and use short, direct sentences. One idea per sentence is best.
idea
The essay shows a view that tech changes how we talk.
content
It uses real tech names like WhatsApp and Facebook.
structure
There is an introduction and a conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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