IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

In the
future
Add a comma
future,
show examples
 any
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
show examples
 of cars, buses and trucks on the roads will be driverless because of still
developing
Use the right word
still-developing
show examples
self driving
Use the right word
self-driving
show examples
 systems. With
this
Linking Words
improving
Replace the word
improved
show examples
 system, driving
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
any where
Use the right word
anywhere
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 any time won’t require a
driver
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will argue that the advantages of
this
Linking Words
 outweigh the drawbacks. In cities
especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
show examples
 in
Use the right word
metropolises
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metropolitans
Add a comma
metropolitans,
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 the city is
awaken
Replace the word
awake
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 7 to 24 hours.
This
Linking Words
 leads all
time
Use the right word
all-time
show examples
 working buses or taxis
etc.
Punctuation problem
, etc.
show examples
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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that is
Linking Words
 causing so many problems
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
safety
Use synonyms
. With
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
self driving
Use the right word
self-driving
show examples
vehicles
Add a comma
vehicles,
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 people will not be worried about the time or the distance of the
trip
Use synonyms
. There will be no tired or angry drivers.
Also
Linking Words
, they won’t be
anxieted
Correct your spelling
anxious
 to travel
abandoned
Change preposition
to abandoned
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 destinations or
using
Wrong verb form
use
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 less crowded roads to reach the destination.
For example
Linking Words
, in Turkey I have often
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoided
show examples
to travel
Verb problem
travelling
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 after 10 pm with any kind of
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
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especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
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 taxis. Because
I
Verb problem
I'm
show examples
 scared of taxi drivers when
I am
Use the right word
I'm
show examples
 alone. They can easily get angry
while
Linking Words
 they
were
Wrong verb form
are
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 driving.
Additionally
Linking Words
, needing a
driver
Use synonyms
 for a
trip
Use synonyms
 doesn’t always
satisfy
Verb problem
provide
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
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amount
Check wording
level
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 of
safety
Use synonyms
. What I mean, it
directly
Verb problem
is directly
show examples
 proportional
with
Change preposition
to
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 the
well being
Use the right word
well-being
show examples
 and feeling of the
driver
Use synonyms
. If the
driver
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 less stress and good
sleep
Punctuation problem
sleep,
show examples
then
Linking Words
 the
trip
Use synonyms
 will be
safier
Correct your spelling
safer
, but
driver
Use synonyms
 feels worried and requires
sleep
Punctuation problem
sleep,
show examples
 it will be less
safier
Correct your spelling
safer
.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 with the
self driving
Use the right word
self-driving
show examples
vehicles
Add a comma
vehicles,
show examples
 the amount of
safety
Use synonyms
 will be steady and won’t be affected
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 external effects. Because
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the end it is a software. On balance, needing a
driver
Use synonyms
 comes with several problems because of the
driver
Use synonyms
itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
. The
safety
Use synonyms
 or experience from the
trip
Use synonyms
 can vary from
driver
Use synonyms
 to
driver
Use synonyms
Linking Words
thus
Punctuation problem
; thus
show examples
,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.

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structure
Make a clear big idea in the first line and keep to it in every paragraph.
structure
Use one idea per paragraph and end with a short wrap up.
content
Add more small facts or ideas to show both good and bad parts.
grammar
Fix big word mistakes and keep grammar simple and right.
cohesion
Use linking words like 'also', 'but', 'however' to make the text flow.
structure
The essay shows a main view and ends with a clear choice.
structure
There is an intro and a conclusion.
content
The idea of safety as a gain is easy to see.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • driverless vehicles
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • increased safety
  • reduced traffic congestion
  • improved efficiency
  • accessibility
  • disabled
  • elderly
  • job displacement
  • privacy concerns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: