IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Social media is gradually replacing in-person face to face contact with many people worldwide. Do the benefits of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

Although
Linking Words
 there is no doubt that social
media
Use synonyms
 platforms are gradually replacing
Use synonyms
face to
Use the right word
face-to-face
show examples
face
Use synonyms
 contact globally ,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that the advantages are greater , since
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 has played
Correct article usage
an
show examples
incredibily
Correct your spelling
incredibly
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
crucial role in
shourtened
Correct your spelling
shortening
 the distances of the world .
Firstly
Linking Words
 , the main advantage of social
media
Use synonyms
 communication compared with
Use synonyms
face to
Use the right word
face-to-face
show examples
face
Use synonyms
 meetings is
regardless
Correct word choice
that regardless
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 of your position
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the planet , you can contact
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your family and your
freinds
Correct your spelling
friends
.
This
Linking Words
 means that people who
travelling
Verb problem
are travelling
show examples
 abroad
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
purpose
Correct article usage
the purpose
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 of studying
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can communicate with their parents and
freinds
Correct your spelling
friends
 without any
problemitic
Correct your spelling
problem
.
For instance
Linking Words
 , despite my friend
have
Wrong verb form
having been
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granted a
schalorship
Correct your spelling
scholarship
 to study overseas , his family
facing
Wrong verb form
faces
show examples
 no problems in terms of contacting
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
him , and they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 need to take tickets to encounter him .
Finally
Linking Words
 ,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 has transformed
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life dramatically , which people can communicate with their relatives regardless of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
distances
Fix the agreement mistake
distance
show examples
.
Furthermore
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 , it
also
Linking Words
 contributes
of reduce
Change preposition
to reducing
show examples
 the amount of money spent on travelling in purposes of meeting your relatives .
On the other hand
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 , taking into
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
account that social
media
Use synonyms
 has
also
Linking Words
 played a significant role
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 flat relationships .
This
Linking Words
 means that as many as flat relationships , as
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
serious problems ,
such
Linking Words
 as
hypocraisy
Correct your spelling
hypocrisy
 and
decieving
Correct your spelling
deceiving
. Take myself as an example , I have experienced a serious problem with
online
Correct article usage
an online
show examples
 friend ,
although
Linking Words
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
didnt
Correct your spelling
didn't
 see his
face
Use synonyms
 and
didnt
Correct your spelling
didn't
 listen to his voice ,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 trusted him.
Therefore
Linking Words
 , he
deceive
Wrong verb form
deceived
show examples
 me and eventually
end
Wrong verb form
ended
show examples
 the
relation
Replace the word
relationship
show examples
 after years of
contacting
Replace the word
contact
show examples
. In conclusion , despite some drawbacks associated with communicating
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 ,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 am convinced that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages
overall
Linking Words
 .

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planning
Plan your essay. State your view in the first sentence. Then add two or three reasons with a short example for each.
grammar
Check your grammar and spelling. Use simple, correct sentences. Watch verb forms and plural s.
cohesion
Use linking words to show order and ideas, such as first, also, however, so.
content
Try to give more balanced view. Briefly show the other side, then explain why your view is right.
content
The essay shows a clear view that social media can bring good for long distance talk.
support
An example about a friend with a scholarship is used to support a point.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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