IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some believe that schools should focus more on academic subjects. Others argue that practical skills should be emphasized. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that academic subjects should be the primary focus of school curricula,
while
Linking Words
 others contend that practical, real-world
skills
Use synonyms
 deserve greater emphasis.In my opinion, academic learning and practical abilities ought to be given equal priority. Focusing on academic learning helps
students
Use synonyms
 significantly expand their horizons and improve their comprehensive literacy.It can help
students
Use synonyms
 enhance their independent thinking ability and improve their personal qualities.
For example
Linking Words
, a research study indicates that individuals who have received advanced education often adopt a more holistic perspective when examining problems.Academic education can help people cultivate rationality and the ability to think independently.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 need to learn
these
Fix the agreement mistake
this
show examples
 academic
knowledge
Use synonyms
 to cope with examinations. Practical
skills
Use synonyms
 enable
students
Use synonyms
 to improve their competence in dealing with everyday
life
Use synonyms
 challenges.It acts as a vital bridge linking academic
knowledge
Use synonyms
 to real
life
Use synonyms
 and society. Imparting practical
skills
Use synonyms
 enables
students
Use synonyms
 to tackle diverse
life
Use synonyms
 challenges, rather than feeling helpless in the face of them.A prior report indicated that certain
students
Use synonyms
, despite attaining high academic achievements, lack basic competence in daily
life
Use synonyms
 and social interactions. Practical abilities can
also
Linking Words
 enable
students
Use synonyms
 to achieve a sense of accomplishment at a faster pace. In short, both academic
knowledge
Use synonyms
 and practical
skills
Use synonyms
 are crucial for education—you can’t do without either.Academic
knowledge
Use synonyms
 helps
students
Use synonyms
 broaden their horizons and learn to think critically,
while
Linking Words
 practical
skills
Use synonyms
 let them handle problems in
life
Use synonyms
 and work, and quickly gain a sense of achievement.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Make your view clear in the first and last lines. Say your main point up front and restate it at the end.
task response
Add strong, real examples to back up your two sides so the reader can see the point.
coherence cohesion
Use easy links to connect ideas from one paragraph to the next.
coherence cohesion
Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and end with a short wrap up to keep the flow.
task response
The essay shows a clear view that both study and practical skill matter.
coherence cohesion
Text is easy to read with good order of ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: