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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many animal species in the world are becoming extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protect these animals from dying out, while others say we should concentrate more on problems of human beings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is often argued that spending money on protecting
animals
Use synonyms
 plays a crucial role in modern society.
However
Linking Words
, others believe that human needs and well-being are more important.
This
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 essay will discuss both sides of
this
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 argument and
then
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 state my own opinion. On the one hand, there are several reasons why people support spending money on animal protection. The main argument is that protecting
animals
Use synonyms
 is necessary because their extinction will disrupt the ecosystem.
In other words
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, if we do not address the root causes of
this
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 problem, like pollution, it will have serious long-term consequences for the planet. A clear example of
this
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 is that some
animals
Use synonyms
, like bees, are very important for growing our food. If bees disappear, it will be very hard for us to grow fruits.
Therefore
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, protecting
animals
Use synonyms
 is
also
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 a way to protect ourselves.
On the other hand
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, there is a strong case to be made for prioritising human problems. Proponents of
this
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 view argue that limited government money should be spent on human needs, like improving access to education and healthcare.
This
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 is because in many countries, people are still very poor or sick. It feels wrong to spend billions on
animals
Use synonyms
 when humans are suffering.
For instance
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, building a new hospital or school can change the lives of thousands of people in a poor area.
As a result
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, governments have a responsibility to solve these human problems first. In conclusion,
while
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 there are valid arguments on both sides, it is my personal view that we must find a way to achieve sustainable development that helps both humans and
animals
Use synonyms
.
Although
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 it is true that human needs are urgent, I believe that protecting our ecosystem is essential for the long-term survival of everyone.

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structure
Make your main idea clear in the first paragraph and keep a clear line of thought in each paragraph.
content
Add more specific and varied examples for each side to deepen the argument.
coherence
Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and avoid too much repetition.
task
Finish with a clear personal view and a brief wrap up.
structure
Clear two-sided view and your own stance are easy to see.
content
Good use of simple real-life examples (bees, hospital).
analysis
There is a logical end with a decision.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • cascading effects
  • economic impacts
  • ecosystem
  • endangered species
  • environmental conservation
  • human welfare
  • moral duty
  • preserve
  • sustainable practices
  • habitats
  • interconnected
  • extinction
  • advocates
  • opponents
  • priority
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