IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

This graphs shows consumption of three type spreads from 1981 to 2007

This graphs shows consumption of three type spreads from 1981 to 2007
This
Linking Words
 line graph compares the three
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
 of spreads - butter, margarine,
low
Correct word choice
low-fat
show examples
 fat and reduced spreads in 1981 and 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
consumption
Use synonyms
 of
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 spreads experienced noticeably different trends over the given period. Butter
consumption
Use synonyms
 fell dramatically, margarine showed a rise followed by
decline
Correct article usage
a decline
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
low-fat and reduced spreads increased rapidly before dropping slightly end of
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
. Butter was the most widely consumed spread
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 around 140
grams
Use synonyms
in 1981 per person
Correct word order
per person in 1981
show examples
. Its
consumption
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
small
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
decreased
to
Rephrase
slightly to
show examples
 100
grams
Use synonyms
 in 1991, before
fell
Wrong verb form
falling
show examples
 to just over around 50
grams
Use synonyms
 in 2007. Margarine began at approximately 90
grams
Use synonyms
 in 1981 and rose to
peak
Correct article usage
a peak
show examples
100
Change preposition
of 100
show examples
grams
Use synonyms
 in 1991.
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
point
Punctuation problem
point,
show examples
 it dropped steadily , falling to just above 40
grams
Use synonyms
 in 2007. In
contrat
Correct your spelling
contrast
, low-fat and reduced
spread
Fix the agreement mistake
spreads
show examples
 were not consumed until
mid-1990s
Correct article usage
the mid-1990s
show examples
. Starting around 15
grams
Use synonyms
 in 1996, their
consumption
Use synonyms
 increased rapidly and reached
peak
Correct article usage
a peak
show examples
exactly
Change preposition
of exactly
show examples
 80
grams
Use synonyms
 in 2001, before
declined
Wrong verb form
declining
show examples
 slightly to over 70
grams
Use synonyms
 in 2007

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, grams with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reduced" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rapidly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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