IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

More people are choosing to work remotely instead of in traditional offices. Do the advantages of remote work outweigh the disadvantages?

These days, the majority of people are working from home rather than coming to the physical workplace.
Although
Linking Words
 working remotely can disrupt the social connection between colleagues, I believe there are more advantages because it increases
the
Correct article usage
apply
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productivity. One major
downsides
Fix the agreement mistake
downside
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 of
tele-working
Correct your spelling
teleworking
 is that it
isolate
Correct subject-verb agreement
isolates
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 worker from their team. The reason behind
this
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 is that they rarely get a chance to work together as they
all are
Correct word order
are all
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 working from
comfort
Correct article usage
the comfort
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 of their home. If employees are working remotely, they rarely get a chance to share their problems and
feeling
Replace the word
feelings
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 with other team members, which reduces social connection.
For example
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, in
traditional
Correct article usage
a traditional
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 office
people
Punctuation problem
, people
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 have their lunch together, which creates a supportive environment and reduces pressure.
However
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, I hold the view that
this
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 issue can be managed by hosting weekly or monthly physical check-in sessions, so it is not as serious as the benefits of working online.
On the other hand
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, the major advantage of remote working is that it
boost
Correct subject-verb agreement
boosts
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 the
perfomance
Correct your spelling
performance
 of an employee.
This
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 is because when they do not have to travel each day to come to the
office
Punctuation problem
office,
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 it will reduce their fatigue and
saves
Correct subject-verb agreement
save
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great
Correct article usage
a great
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 amount of time, which they can use to excel in their role. If employees are given freedom and they are accountable
to
Change preposition
for
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 their job,
this
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 automatically makes them disciplined.
For instance
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,
while
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 working from
home
Punctuation problem
home,
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 they can spend their spare time with their family
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 helps them to relax, which is not possible
while
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 working
from
Change preposition
in
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office
Correct article usage
the office
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. In my view,
this
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 benefit is more significant as it improves
people
Check wording
people's
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 performance and helps to reduce stress. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 it might isolate employees at some point, we can still solve
this
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 situation
organising
Change preposition
by organising
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 well-being workshops and meetings
, one
Punctuation problem
. One
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 must consider the positives of
this
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 trend
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 drastically improves the performance of an employee and gives extra time as they do not have to commute. For these reasons, the positives far outnumber the negatives.

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planning
Plan your essay. State your view at once, then add two strong points with a small example, and end with a short line that closes.
structure
Make one main idea in each paragraph. Start with a clear sentence for that idea, then give a reason and one example.
coherence
Link ideas with small words like 'and', 'but', 'also', 'however', 'for this reason'. This helps the flow.
grammar
Check your grammar and spelling for simple words. For example, use 'it boosts' not 'it boost'; 'the comfort of home' is fine.
content
Give more than one example. Talk about cost, time away from home, balance of life, trust at work.
strength
The writer has a clear view on remote work.
structure
The essay has a simple shape with an intro, body, and conclusion.
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