Some people believe that studying for a university degree is better for an individual’s career than gaining work experience immediately after high school. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Individuals think developing work
experience
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right after graduating high school is better rather than studying for a university
degree
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is best for them.
This
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topic is often one-sided,
deeper
Verb problem
requiring deeper
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knowledge and
certified
Correct article usage
a certified
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ability to work.
This
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essay agrees with
this
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opinion.
Firstly
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, studying for a
degree
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has many potential advantages
,
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.
show examples
Linking Words
Additionally
Add a comma
Additionally,
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students who graduate from universities are considered to be professionals in their field, and their academic understanding of the subject complements their career journey.
For instance
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, a person who works at a construction site with good
experience
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might sound good.
However
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, an individual with a
degree
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doesn't need much
experience
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and can adapt faster because of their knowledge in the field.
Thus
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giving them the chance to improve their skills faster and to be promoted
Secondly
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, universities promise a stable career path with an officially recognised diploma. Modern companies want to build a workforce with people who have mastered their field, often requiring a
degree
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.
For example
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, high-paying jobs
such
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as doctors and engineers would be impossible with just
background
Correct article usage
a background
show examples
.
Therefore
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, these require high academic and practical knowledge
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such
Punctuation problem
, such
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as anatomy, complex physics and mathematics
Punctuation problem
, that
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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are mainly taught in university. In conclusion, having a certified
degree
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promises us jobs that most of the time are paid higher
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in
Punctuation problem
, in
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contrast to jobs that do not require a
degree
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. Getting work
experience
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right after high school seems promising but in the long term, people who have degrees most of the time are more successful.

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planning
Plan your writing. Say your view in the intro and keep it in all parts.
structure
Give two main reasons why a degree can help and add a small point on how work study can help. Then say why your view still wins.
coherence
Use simple link words to show order and reason, like first, then, also, because, so.
grammar
Use short clear sentences. Check for big grammar or spelling errors.
content
Show real and clear examples to back each point, like jobs that need a degree.
strength
There is a clear view and some good plan in the essay.
strength
The writer uses order words like firstly and secondly.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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