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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and the chart below provide a breakdown of the total expenditure and the average amount of money spent by students per week while studying abroad in 4 countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant

The table and the chart below provide a breakdown of the total expenditure and the average amount of money spent by students per week while studying abroad in 4 countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant
The table gives information about
Linking Words
overall
Rephrase
apply
show examples
how much
money
Use synonyms
 was spent by
students
Use synonyms
 who
studies
Correct subject-verb agreement
study
show examples
 abroad,
while
Linking Words
bar
Correct article usage
the bar
show examples
 chart compares the average amount of
money
Use synonyms
 spent by
students
Use synonyms
 per week
while
Linking Words
 studying abroad in four different countries. In general, what stands out from the graphs
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 that
students
Use synonyms
 who live in
country
Use synonyms
 A spend a great amount of
Use synonyms
money
Punctuation problem
money,
show examples
while
Linking Words
 in
country
Use synonyms
 D, they spend the lowest amount of
money
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in all countries, daily expenses were the highest, except
Use synonyms
country
Change preposition
in country
show examples
 D. Looking more closely at the table, in
country
Use synonyms
 A
Use synonyms
students’
Punctuation problem
, students’
show examples
 total expenditure was the largest
than
Change preposition
among
show examples
 others, with 875$. In
country
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
,
students
Use synonyms
 spend a bit less than
Use synonyms
country
Change preposition
in country
show examples
 A, with 735$. 540$ was accounted for in
country
Use synonyms
 C. In terms of
country
Use synonyms
D
Punctuation problem
, D
show examples
had the minimum expenditure of 435$.
According to
Linking Words
 the bar chart, living cost was
Change preposition
at a
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 top of the list, 430$ and 320$ recorded in
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 A and
B
Use synonyms
respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
show examples
. As for
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 C and D, they spend 275$ and 225$, in that order. Turning to the tuition fees, in
country
Use synonyms
 A considered much higher than
Use synonyms
country
Change preposition
in country
show examples
 D, with 358% and 235$. In
country
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
,
students
Use synonyms
 spend 320$ for tuition
while
Linking Words
 in
country
Use synonyms
 C,
students
Use synonyms
 spend a bit less, with 250$. When it comes to accommodation expenditures
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 highest in
country
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
, with 280$. In other countries, they spend approximately 240$ and 200$.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words money, students, country, b with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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