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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart illustrates the world
illiteracy
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rates
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 by gender for five different places (developed countries, Latin American/
Carribean
Correct your spelling
Caribbean
, East
Asia
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/Oceania, Sub-Saharan Africa, the Arab States and South
Asia
Use synonyms
) for the
last
Linking Words
 year. In general,
males
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 had a lower
illiteracy
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 rate compared with
females
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 in each place. South
Asia
Use synonyms
 had the highest
rates
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 for individuals who could not read in both the male and female categories, and developed countries had the lowest
rates
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 for
illiteracy
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. In South
Asia
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, the
illiteracy
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rates
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 for women were roughly 55%,
whereas
Linking Words
 for
men
Punctuation problem
men,
show examples
 it was around 35%. The
amount
Check wording
number
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 of female individuals who could not read in the Arab States
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 around 50%,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 number of male individuals who were illiterate
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 nearly 30%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in Sub-Saharan
Africa
Add a comma
Africa,
show examples
 the
illiteracy
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rates
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 were around 50% and roughly 30% for
females
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 and
males
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, respectively. In East
Asia
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/
Oceania
Punctuation problem
Oceania,
show examples
 the
illiteracy
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rates
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 for women were 20%,
whereas
Linking Words
 for
males
Use synonyms
 it was roughly 10%. In
Latin
Correct article usage
the Latin
show examples
 American/
Caribean
Use the right word
Caribbean
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region
Punctuation problem
region,
show examples
 the
illiteracy
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rates
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 for both genders were similar, 10% and about 12% for
males
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 and
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females
Punctuation problem
females,
show examples
 respectively. The
illiteracy
Use synonyms
rates
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 were near zero for both
males
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 and
females
Use synonyms
 in developed countries.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words illiteracy, rates, asia, males, females with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Illiteracy rates
  • Region
  • Gender disparity
  • Bar chart
  • Estimated
  • Summarise
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Analyzing
  • Discrepancies
  • Significant
  • Pronounced
  • Speculation
  • Male
  • Female
  • Global perspective
  • Literacy
  • Educational attainment
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Cultural influences
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