IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In some countries, shopping online is replacing shopping at store. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In my opinion, online
shops
Use synonyms
 can replace some
stores
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, but
Linking Words
Correct pronoun usage
they also
show examples
also can
Correct word order
can also
show examples
 make life easier. Some
people
Use synonyms
 actually like walking by
shops
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 and looking at clothes, products and items by themselves, but it can cause some difficulties. I mean, in real
Use synonyms
shops
Punctuation problem
shops,
show examples
 you can have problems like queues,
people
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, which can obstruct you from shopping. Especially
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 if you don’t have too much time. Positive
things
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 in shopping offline are that you actually know
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 where you can buy what you need.
Also
Linking Words
, you can see the actual price and what they have in their
stores
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. Because in online
stores
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 you can’t see price, which is actual
.
Check wording
price.
show examples
 In real life, it can be more expensive or cheaper. In
shops
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 you can see
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 what they have in existence, but online you can’t. From negative
things
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, we have queues, and
people
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 can distract you and spend your time on nothing. In online
shops
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, we can order some
things
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, and we don’t have to go outside for that.
People
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 create special online
shops
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, which have information about supermarkets, clothes
stores
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, restaurants
or
Correct word choice
and
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 others. One minus is that sites or online
shops
Use synonyms
 can make some errors in your order. Like bringing the wrong size of shoes, or bringing you cold food, which is supposed to be warm or hot. These
things
Use synonyms
 are really disappointing
people
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 who wanted nice results with all criteria.

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task
Your view is not clear. Say if you think online shopping is positive or negative in one line, then add two or three reasons.
structure
Use simple links to show ideas go in order (for example, first, then, also).
content
Give more proof for each point, like how online shopping saves time or costs.
grammar
Fix small spelling and form errors to help readers follow.
content
You explain both sides, good for balance.
content
You give examples like queues and wrong items.
vocabulary
The ideas are easy to read because you use simple words.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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