IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should beto give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What ,in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?

About 60% of the world's population
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 at their prime workable age
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is causing an imbalance with
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
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 supply of job seekers and
lowered
Use the right word
lower
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 demand by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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employers.
This
Linking Words
is
Verb problem
apply
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imbalance is polarised
further
Linking Words
due to
Linking Words
 advanced technology and automation
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is contributing to operational efficiency across all sectors. Some people think that
universities
Use synonyms
 should include professional
skills
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 and education in their
curriculum
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,
while
Linking Words
 others may be of the opinion that
universities
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 should not focus much on professional
skills
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. In my opinion, a university should focus on empowering
their
Fix the agreement mistake
its
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students
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 with professional
skills
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 mainly
due to
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 two main reasons. 95% of the post-graduate
students
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 aim to join the workforce after their course completion. Professional
skills
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 learnt in their
curriculum
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sets
Wrong verb form
set
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 them apart from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others who are not aware
about
Change preposition
of
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 the same.
This
Linking Words
 increases their chances
to join
Change preposition
of joining
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 the workforce within 3 months of their course completion.
Students
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 with professional
skills
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 are more likely to excel in their workplace as well, since employers do not have to spend resources in training them from scratch. Employers consider
such
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 candidates as high ROI. With the increase in
unemployablity
Correct your spelling
unemployment
 rate, equipping
students
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 with professional
skills
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also
Linking Words
 encourages entrepreneurial spirits. It allows the
students
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 to pursue their entrepreneurial journey, rather than depending on the job market. Professional skill
Linking Words
along
Punctuation problem
, along
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 with
in-depth
Correct article usage
an in-depth
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 understanding of a
subject
Punctuation problem
subject,
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 allows
students
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 the freedom to choose their career path without constraints.
However
Linking Words
,
universities
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 without
professional
Correct article usage
a professional
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curriculum
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obliges
Replace the word
obligate
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 their
students
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 to work harder to come at par with the job market
requirement
Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
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.
Hence
Linking Words
, I am of the opinion, all
universities
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 should include
professional
Punctuation problem
professional,
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 technical and soft
skills
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 in their
curriculum
Use synonyms
.

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task planning
Plan a short intro that states your view and what points you will cover.
idea development
Limit to 2-3 main ideas and give a simple example for each.
language accuracy
Fix grammar and spell common errors; use simple sentences.
coherence
Use linking words to show order and contrast.
critical thinking
Add a short counter point or mention why you think your view is best.
spelling
Check spelling of tough words like unemployability; keep simple vocab.
clarity
The view is clear and kept steady.
argument
Reasons support the main idea.
cohesion
Linking words help flow in places.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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