IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in five countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphic envisions how many
tourists
Use synonyms
 arrive
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 different countries each year.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
biggest
Correct article usage
the biggest
show examples
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
tourists
Use synonyms
 choose to visit
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
while
Linking Words
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 of them go to Brazil. During the entire time from 1995 to
2010
Add a comma
2010,
show examples
 the leading country
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 considered the
USA
Use synonyms
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 their tourist number went up from 70
million
Use synonyms
 to 85
million
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, France started the year 1995
at
Change preposition
with
show examples
 30
million
Use synonyms
 visitors
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 in the year 2010 their tourist count reached the same number as in the
USA
Use synonyms
. Malaysia kicked off roughly at the same spot as France
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 only 20
million
Use synonyms
tourists
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
while
Linking Words
 their growth was
positive
Punctuation problem
positive,
show examples
 the country only reached 50
million
Use synonyms
 foreigners
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is almost 2 times
as
Rephrase
apply
show examples
less
as
Change preposition
than
show examples
 France and
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
. Egypt and Brazil both began their journey at the same point, 5
million
Use synonyms
tourists
Use synonyms
. And
while
Linking Words
 their charts were
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 fluctuating from all of the countries
Egypt
Punctuation problem
, Egypt
show examples
 only managed to reach 20
million
Use synonyms
 visitors
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 Brazil only 15
million
Use synonyms

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tourists, usa, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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