IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries , the quality life in large cities is becoming worse. Why is this? What measures could be taken to solve it?

These days,
life
Use synonyms
 conditions in big
cities
Use synonyms
 are getting worse and worse. Migration and
prolifiration
Correct your spelling
proliferation
 of construction work are the core factors which impact city
life
Use synonyms
 negatively.
However
Linking Words
, there are numerous actions that can be taken
so as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to mitigate the circumstance. One major incentive that leads to the deterioration of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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city
life
Use synonyms
 is an increasing number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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residents. For many years, a number of individuals who
inhabit
Verb problem
live
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 in
Correct article usage
the countrysides
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countrysides
Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
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 have been moving to
downtowns
Fix the agreement mistake
downtown
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so
Check wording
areas so
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 that they can work in better places and have an opportunity to be promoted. It is undeniable that small towns have fewer job opportunities
,
Punctuation problem
;
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therefore
Linking Words
, their population may only be employed in farming and agricultural sectors.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they come to
cities
Use synonyms
 in search of better chances.
Besides
Linking Words
, in many
cities
Use synonyms
 around the globe
modern
Punctuation problem
, modern
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 buildings are being built
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 in order to meet the demands of their citizens and attract more tourists, leading to air pollution. People who reside in these sites have health-related issues, especially
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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promlems
Correct your spelling
problems
 with their respiratory organs.
As a result
Linking Words
, they are not satisfied with their
life
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, spending most of their budget on medicine and doctors, which in turn
influencing
Wrong verb form
influences
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on
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apply
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their quality
Use synonyms
life
Change preposition
of life
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.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, if necessary steps are taken, the situation might be alleviated. One of them is creating job opportunities in rural
areas
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. As long as people are
applied
Wrong verb form
applying
show examples
 for jobs which completely satisfy them, they will not move to urban
areas
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, building factories and offices in remote
areas
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 can
assist to
Verb problem
help
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 address the issue.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the government should draw their attention not only to
cities
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
villages
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to villages
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. Constructing essential structures in
such
Linking Words
 spots will be beneficial for both individuals and the government. Because by doing
this
Linking Words
, they develop the whole country, ensuring the citizens with fulfilling
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 and they get rid of the issue of air pollution.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
aggreviation
Correct your spelling
aggravation
 of citizens'
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 in urban
areas
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 is a
crusial
Correct your spelling
crucial
 subject that ought to be tackled. Population growth in
cities
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 and building infrastructure are the main reasons for
this
Linking Words
 problem. Yet with proper plans to open new
working places
Use the right word
workplaces
show examples
 and wise construction
work
Add a comma
work,
show examples
 the issue can be addressed.

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structure
The write is not full in some part. Use one main idea per paragraph and say it in a clear line.
coherence
Show how each problem leads to a fix. Use a clear link from issue to plan.
language
Spell and grammar need care. Use small, plain sentences and common words.
content
The text gives the idea of the problem and a plan to fix it.
structure
There are linking words that help join thoughts.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urbanization
  • Overpopulation
  • Infrastructure
  • Pollution
  • Housing shortages
  • Rental and property prices
  • Traffic congestion
  • Public transportation
  • Deforestation
  • Urban sprawl
  • Mental health
  • Economic disparity
  • Waste management
  • Environmental impact
  • Public health
  • Recreational areas
  • Wealth gap
  • Cost of living
  • Lifestyle
  • Stress
What to do next:
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