The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The picture illustrates the
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sugar making
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sugar-making
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process
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from
sugar
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cane.  
Overall
Linking Words
,
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process
Correct article usage
the process
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contains seven different stages. Some stages include innovative technological machines for numerous purposes,
such
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as harvesting of crops,crushing of
sugar
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cane,purifying juice
filter
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, evaporating cylinder and a container for drying and cooling of
sugar
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. The
process
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begins with the growing of the
sugar
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cane in the fields. The duration of growing is about 12 to 18 months. After the full growth, it is followed by
harvesting
Correct article usage
the harvesting
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process
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. The harvesting is not only
does
Wrong verb form
done
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by
farmer
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farmers
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but
also
Linking Words
with the harvesting machines. The next
stage
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includes crushing of the
sugar
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canes, in which
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
canes
put
Verb problem
are put
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inside a machine that produces juice
of
Change preposition
from
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the
sugar
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canes. In the following
stage
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,
jucice
Correct your spelling
juice
is poured on the
filter
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paper for the purification
process
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. That
filter
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is called
limestone
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a limestone
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filter
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.
Linking Words
Then
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The
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next step is
production
Correct article usage
the production
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of syrup from juice by using
Correct article usage
the evaportation
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evaportation
Correct your spelling
evaporation
technique. The diagram shows that in the sixth
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stage
Add a comma
stage,
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a centrifuge separates
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
crystals from syrup by moving
anti-clockwise
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counterclockwise
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. In the
last
Linking Words
stage
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, syrup is dried and cooled, which
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
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shape
Correct article usage
the shape
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of
sugar
Use synonyms
.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, process, filter, stage with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • mature
  • harvest
  • extract
  • purification
  • impurities
  • evaporation
  • thick syrup
  • crystallization
  • centrifugation
  • molasses
  • raw sugar crystals
  • refinement
  • purify
  • whiten
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