IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie charts indicate changes in the proportions of energy produced in the US from 1983 to 2003. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The provided pie charts give information about changes in the percentages of
energy
Use synonyms
generation
Use synonyms
 in the United States over a 21-year period between 1983 and 2003.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen from the charts that
oil
Use synonyms
 accounted for the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
energy
Use synonyms
generation
Use synonyms
 throughout the two
years
Use synonyms
 shown,
whereas
Linking Words
 hydropower recorded the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 across both
years
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 the charts, natural gas and coal experienced a change of 10
percentage
Use synonyms
 points over the period.
However
Linking Words
, natural gas increased, reaching 23%,
while
Linking Words
 coal declined by the same amount, reaching 13%. In terms of
oil
Use synonyms
 and nuclear,
in addition
Linking Words
 to representing the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
energy
Use synonyms
generation
Use synonyms
, both illustrate similar increasing patterns, with each rising by 4
percentage
Use synonyms
 points across the two
years
Use synonyms
. In 2003, nuclear accounted for 24%,
while
Linking Words
oil
Use synonyms
 made up 42%. As for hydropower, no changes were observed during the 21-year period, with its share remaining at 4%.
Overall
Linking Words
,
oil
Use synonyms
 continued to dominate
energy
Use synonyms
generation
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 alternative sources showed relatively limited changes over the
years
Use synonyms
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 hydropower being the exception.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, generation, oil, percentage, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 6 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • energy production
  • proportions
  • significance
  • notable increases
  • decreases
  • consistencies
  • emphasize
  • analyze
  • highlight
  • trends
  • emerging patterns
  • shifts
  • decline
  • rise
  • percentage
  • renewable sources
  • non-renewable sources
  • comparative analysis
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