IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Part 2 The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people claim that
a
Correct article usage
the
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 spare
time
Use synonyms
 between weekdays intended for employees should be extended. In recent years, research has found that approximately 70% of the population agrees with the statement above. The following essay looks at the positive sides of the argument. To start with, I believe that
this
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 nature of extension of leisure
time
Use synonyms
 would positively affect working individuals.
For instance
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, in terms of resting, spending their
time
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 with their families
or
Punctuation problem
, or
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 even enhancing their hidden abilities or hobbies, which they cannot improve because of work. Many people in a poverty situation are cognizant of the fact that if
this
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 type of change were implemented in contemporary society, the wages would definitely decrease, which
changes
Wrong verb form
would change
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 their bank status. Another benefit is that a longer weekend would boost the employees' energy and, in the best-case scenario, the company's productivity would increase.
However
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, employees' attitude may enhance it is worth considering that there are
also
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 companies that require stable activities,
such
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 as daily support with their customers or even their healthcare, in places like hospitals.
To sum up
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, in my opinion, additional spare
time
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 from working individuals
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 may be used for positive factors by,
for example
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, enhancing their abilities, getting a positive attitude or developing their hobbies, which cannot be improved
further
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 because of work, would maintain their mental health, and make a more peaceful and productive life.

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structure
State your view clearly in the first sentence of the essay.
coherence
Use topic sentences to start each paragraph and put one main idea in each paragraph.
examples
Give clear, simple example for each point and connect them to your idea.
language
Check grammar and break long sentences to make them easy to read.
organization
Good use of linking words like To start with, Another benefit, To sum up.
stance
The writer holds a clear view and tries to discuss both sides.
content
Some ideas are close to the topic and fit a real talking task.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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