IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph illustrates the monthly
price
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 percentage of copper, nickel, and zinc in 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
price
Correct article usage
the price
show examples
 of nickel started with
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
price
Use synonyms
 increase and ended with
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
price
Use synonyms
changes
Fix the agreement mistake
change
show examples
, meanwhile zinc
experience
Replace the word
experienced
show examples
 the opposite. On January, 6% was the average of nickel's
price
Use synonyms
 transformation and was the highest throughout the
year
Use synonyms
. The cost
changing
Replace the word
change
show examples
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
 significantly until June, and
reach
Correct subject-verb agreement
reaches
show examples
 its lowest
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 -3%
,
Punctuation problem
. Subsequently
show examples
subsequently
Linking Words
, the
change
Use synonyms
tend
Wrong verb form
tends
show examples
 to increase to 1%
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 December.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, zinc's average was
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
 and was the highest
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
year
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
it was the lowest at the beginning of the
year
Use synonyms
. Copper was on the second rank at the beginning and the end of the
year
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
, during the period, the
price
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 was
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
 and
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 its highest
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 February, with 3%
change
Use synonyms
. From April through the following months, the three metals showed a similar trend of cost
change
Use synonyms
. Interestingly, between July to September, all
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
three metals'
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
Use synonyms
change
Check wording
apply
show examples
were stagnant. In conclusion, the
price
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 shows a downward trend in 2014.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words price, change, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "change" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 8 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuate
  • volatile
  • stability
  • peak
  • trough
  • increment
  • decrement
  • steady
  • gradual
  • sharp
  • increase
  • decrease
  • month-on-month
  • average monthly change
  • commodity
  • benchmark
  • trend
  • precipitous
  • plateau
  • significant
  • marginal
  • surge
  • dip
  • plummet
  • soar
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