People are less fit and active nowadays than in the past. What are the reasons for this? What measures can be taken to fix this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relavent examples from your own knowledge and experience

Our predecessors were more energetic and physically fit
,
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as compared to the present generation. The
main two
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two main
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causes for
such
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a change are
,
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the advancement in technology and the preference
of
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for
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the virtual world. If we could limit our dependency on
machines
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and bring a change in our hobbies, we can definitely achieve the
physic
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physical
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and the energy of those in the past. The major culprit of the ever-changing physical competency
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is the introduction of mechanical
eqipments
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equipment
. The use of
machines
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has
seized
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reduced
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the need for physical labour, predisposing us to an unfit body and a lazy lifestyle.
For example
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, ages ago, daily chores like washing clothes and sweeping the floor
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were manual labour,
thus
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allowing our muscles to undergo a form of routine exercise.
Machines
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have conquered the house related work
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in recent times. With the invention of washing
machines
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and
vaccum
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vacuum
cleaners, household work has become a non-straneous activity.
Furthermore
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,
advance
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advanced
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technology has given birth to online platforms. Our hobbies have changed
along with
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the changing world.
For instance
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, my free time would include outdoor games like hockey or badminton in my younger
day
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days
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,
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;
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this
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is
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has unfortunately changed into online games and social media scrolling,
thus
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decreasing our physical activity
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significantly.
This
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trend can be ceased by incorporating minute changes in our habits.
Firstly
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, occasional
independency
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independence
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of mechanical household
equipments
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equipment
can lead to a better a healthier life.
For instance
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, uninstalling
dishwasher
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the dishwasher
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and washing dishes by hand or physically sweeping the house
instead
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of using a
vaccum
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vacuum
cleaner.
Secondly
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, holding onto the old hobbies can change the outlook of our body, without needing to invest extra time for
gymn
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gym
visits. Indulging in outdoor sports as opposed to online gaming
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can
also
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be a reliable way of regaining
the
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lost energy and
loosing
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losing
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exccess
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excess
fat. In conclusion, people in the past did not have the luxury of technology,
thus
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making it easier to live an active lifestyle. Inculcating those ideas into our daily lives
,
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can do wonders
to
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our mind and body.

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task response
Make your intro clear by stating your view on the problem and what you will cover.
coherence
Use one idea per paragraph. Begin with a topic sentence and end with a short line.
grammar
Fix spelling and grammar errors (for example equipment, vacuum, etc.).
language use
Use simple, exact words. Keep sentences short and clear.
examples
Add more real and varied examples from daily life related to the topic.
structure and style
Watch length and punctuation to keep the essay steady.
structure
Plan is easy to follow: causes then fixes.
content
Examples link to real life (machines, chores, sports).
tone
The tone is calm and easy to read.
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