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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

There is no denying the fact that employees should
work
Use synonyms
 less on weekdays. It is a commonly held belief that workers must have longer weekends and fewer working days
,
Punctuation problem
;
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 there is an argument that opposes
this
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 idea. In my opinion, I consider that working is a crucial thing in someone's life and shortening working hours means more free
time
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 , which leads to unfavourable things.
To begin
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 with,
work
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 can fill your
time
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 and brain with what belongs to it.
In other words
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,
instead
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 of playing around and thinking of nonsense ideas and thoughts, it is better to consider what benefits you.
For example
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, most high school students miss school during long holidays and feel more depressed,
according to
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 a published university research in 2013. Another point to consider is that
work
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 aligns with human nature. It is possible to say that humans are here to
work
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 and hustle, but not to keep resting.
Moreover
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, we can deny that resting is an important thing to do from
time
Use synonyms
 to
time
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, but not as the main dominant of our lives.
For instance
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, humans used to live their lives, looking and searching for the main important sources of living, which are water, food and shelter.
Linking Words
That is the
Verb problem
The
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 normal life of humans is to be busy with
work
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. In conclusion, despite people having different
overviews
Check wording
opinions
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, I consider the idea of making working hours shorter and extending weekends a horrible idea that opposes the nature of human beings and the rules of life.

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task
Plan a clear view and stick to it. State your main point in the first paragraph. Then give two or three reasons with one simple example for each.
structure
Make a plan for your paragraph. Use a row of idea that goes from start to end. Put an intro, a middle with reasons, and a short end.
examples
Use one example that fits the point you make. Explain how it shows the idea. Do not use too many ideas in one example.
language
Use easy, common words. Check your grammar. Shorten long sentences and avoid hard words.
content
The writer shows a clear bias and keeps to the chosen view.
content
There are some good ideas about how work can fill time.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
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