IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The bar chart below shows the hours per week that teenagers spend doing certain activities in Chester from 2002 to 2007.

The bar chart illustrates the trend in the amounts of time spent by Chester adolescents
on
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participating in seven particular activities over a six-year period from 2002 to 2007. The data was measured in the number of
hours
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 per
week
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that watching television was always the most popular activity,
whereas
Linking Words
 the least time was recorded in bowling. That routine and two others, going to pubs/discos and
shopping
Punctuation problem
shopping,
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 showed
the
Correct article usage
a
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 significant increase in the amount of time teenagers spent on them, in stark contrast to the four remaining activities, except for watching DVDs
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 fluctuated. Teenagers spent 25
hours
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 each
week
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on
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watching TV in 2002
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 roughly increased to almost 40
hours
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 in 2007. Both going to pubs/discos and shopping were spent about seven
hours
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 per
week
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 in 2001
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 much higher in the final year of the period, 15
hours
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 on shopping and 17
hours
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 on the remaining routine.
While
Linking Words
 doing homework
was
Verb problem
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spent more than 12
hours
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 in 2002, it declined consistently to 7
hours
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 in 2007. Doing sports fell
down through
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during
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 the surveyed period , especially in
final
Correct article usage
the final
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 two years, from 10
hours
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 in the first year to approximately 2
hours
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at the end
Linking Words
. Bowling was just under 5
hours
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 throughout
this
Linking Words
 seven-year survey and eventually finished in less than one hour per
week
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. The number of
hours
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 teenagers engaged in watching DVDs started with about 11
hours
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 in 2002 and reached the peak at a higher 17
hours
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 in 2004 before the dramatic drop to 10
hours
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 in the final year.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, week with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amounts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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