IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people prefer to live in an extended family where a number of different generations live together. Others prefer to live in a small, nuclear family. List some of the advantages and disadvantages of living in a large, extended family.

In today's world,
while
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 many individuals prefer to
habitate
Correct your spelling
live
 in nuclear
families
Use synonyms
, others still find value in living with extended family.
This
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 essay investigates the pros and cons of dwelling in large
families
Use synonyms
. One central advantage of large
families
Use synonyms
 is the strong bonds created, which reduce loneliness for members.
In addition
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, there are more opportunities for mutual support in doing home chores.
For example
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, a Facebook post recently showed several classy traditional houses being unveiled in rural Zimbabwe; the owners unanimously attributed the high
successful completion
Check wording
success
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 rates to the sharing of financial costs and labour requirements by household members. Despite the notable efficiency in executing home tasks and the potential for forming lasting family bonds, there remains a high chance of conflict and competition among members.
Additionally
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, favouritism has been shown to be high in
such
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 situations.
Furthermore
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, many big
families
Use synonyms
 face enduring poverty resulting from limited resources to sustain their livelihoods.
This
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 phenomenon commonly occurs in African
families
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 and culminates in their
dependancy
Correct your spelling
dependence
 on aid from non-profit organisations. In conclusion, extended family arrangements,
as well as
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 nuclear ones, carry significant benefits and challenges.
Therefore
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, the choice to live in either family type is mostly
dependant
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dependent
show examples
 on what individuals prefer.

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task
The essay answers the task well by showing pros and cons and a short view at the end. To raise the score, add more clear facts or examples and give a stronger ending that says what you think.
coherence
language
structure
Clear structure with introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence
Some linking words to connect ideas.
content
The topic is treated with both sides and a final view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • support system
  • cultural traditions
  • financial support
  • economical
  • emotional support
  • companionship
  • isolation
  • privacy
  • conflicts
  • disagreements
  • responsibilities
  • obligations
  • burdensome
  • decision-making
  • diverse role models
What to do next:
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