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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many modern societies, grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with their grandparents. What do you think are the consequences of this?

Generation
Correct article usage
The generation
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 of today is often seen spending less time with their Grandparents.
This
Linking Words
 leads to disconnection from learning important lessons from cultural , social
values
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 pronouncing mother
language
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 becomes hard.
Fewer
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Less
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 time spent with the elderly people results in a lack of understanding of
culture
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 and meaningful
values
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 that
comes
Correct subject-verb agreement
come
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 with learning
culture
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Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as social skills,how to show respect,
Correct word choice
and smpathy
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smpathy
Correct your spelling
sympathy
 for others. By not learning, youngsters become disrespectful, and the chain of passing these useful
values
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 from one generation to another ends here.
For example
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,
Children
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 in India learn to respect elders by touching their
feets
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feet
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 to seek blessings and to show respect . If modern
children
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does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
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 not understand its importance , they will think that doing
this
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 is disrespectful .
Moreover
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,
children
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 who are born abroad learn their mother
language
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 from their grandparents . If they do not sit with them to talk, they would never master it
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 chances are they may mispronounce the words. Speaking
regional
Correct article usage
the regional
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language
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 is a way to stay connected with their home country and have
feeling
Correct article usage
a feeling
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 for its people. If they fail to learn, they totally disconnect themselves from
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
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 roots.
For example
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,
Children
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 born in Canada to Indian Couples are seen speaking Hindi and Punjabi
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language
Check wording
apply
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in a very odd manner
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is a kind of disrespect for the
language
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 .
To conclude
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, Grandparents
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
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 in passing on old
culture
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 and essential
values
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 to their
grand
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grandchildren
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children
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 . By spending less time,
children
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 fail to acquire important lessons and skills that
old
Correct article usage
the old
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culture
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 offers
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 they
also
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 break their connection with
home
Correct pronoun usage
their home
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 country by not
pronouncing
Verb problem
speaking
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 the local
language
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 in its
real
Correct word choice
true
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way
Check wording
form
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.

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structure
Plan what you say before you write. Use one idea in each paragraph. Make your view clear in the start and in the end.
task
Have a clear intro that states your view. End with a short, strong conclusion.
examples
Share more real and varied examples and say how they show the idea.
grammar
Fix bad grammar and spelling. Watch words like feet, respect, and language.
style
Use short, simple sentences. Link ideas with words like first, next, also, but.
content
Good idea to talk about culture and language with real examples.
content
The essay tries to show harm from less time with elders.
structure
Conclusion follows the idea and ends the view.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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