IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your experience.

There is no denying the fact that most of the newly developed machines are able to do the work which people used to perform.
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while
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While
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 it is a commonly held belief that machines will replace humans, there is
also
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 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that all new technologies have been developed to support
humans
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humans,
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 not to replace them.
To begin
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 with, using new technology makes our
life
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lives
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 easier and faster in terms of communication and productivity. Tasks that might take a whole day
,
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apply
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now can
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can now
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 be done in minutes with the help of AI.
For example
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, all repetitive jobs can now be automated using AI
which
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, which
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 will give employees more time to focus on creative and strategic work. Another point to consider, relying heavily on new technology might reduce the creativity of the person.
For instance
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, if you are using AI to write all your emails and essays will
led
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lead
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 to
lack
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a lack
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 of creative writing and will
let
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always have
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 you
always
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apply
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think of AI to take care of replying to others, which is not recommended. In conclusion, despite people having different
view
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views
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, I believe that using technology has its
won
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own
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 pros and cons, and it is all about how people
utilize
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utilise
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 it. Machines can not replace us
,
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;
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however
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,
it
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they
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is
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are
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 there to support our
day to day
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day-to-day
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 work.

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grammar
Improve grammar and spelling: use 'cannot' not 'can not', 'will lead' not 'will led', 'own' not 'won'. Check word form.
structure
Plan the essay better: one clear intro, two body parts (one on good points, one on bad points), and a short conclusion.
task response
Give a real example from your life or a strong clear example to show how tech helps or harms you.
coherence
Keep ideas simple and links clear. Use simple join words like 'first', 'also', 'but', 'so' to show how ideas connect.
task response
End with a clear restatement of your view and a quick summary of main points.
content
The writer shows a clear view that tech should support humans.
structure
There are links used to connect ideas.
content
The essay has a conclusion that sums up the view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • automation
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • job displacement
  • hazardous
  • retraining
  • reskilling
  • technological advancement
  • output levels
  • cost savings
  • dependence on technology
  • skills gap
  • malfunction
  • cyber threats
  • economic challenges
  • manufacturing
  • agriculture
  • workplace safety
  • investment in training
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