IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that technological developments have made our lives more complicated. Others believe that technology has made life easier. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

These days, there has been an ongoing debate regarding the significance of technology in human
life
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.
While
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 some
people
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 argue that the advancements in digital tools
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 complicated our
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
, others claim that
such
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 developments
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 raised the level of convenience. In my opinion, I strongly agree with the latter view because of the positive benefits in communication and work culture. On the one hand, critics argue that
life
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 has become difficult because of technological innovations.
This
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 is mainly because over-reliance on digital devices,
such
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 as mobile phones and computers,
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 significantly reduced the physical interaction among individuals, and,
as a result
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,
people
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 are increasingly feeling isolated in society.
For example
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, a recent survey revealed that an average of 45% of
younsters
Correct your spelling
youngsters
 avoid direct communication, as they focus on social media websites for communication,
such
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 as Facebook and Instagram.
Therefore
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, it is evident that
such
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 digital platforms have reduced
the
Correct article usage
apply
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human interaction, which
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 caused significant impacts on the
overall
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 well-being of the general populace.
On the other hand
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, advocates claim that
such
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developmets
Correct your spelling
developments
 have made our
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 easy.
Firstly
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,
such
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 digital platforms have enhanced our
communciation
Correct your spelling
communication
 instantaneously regardless of time and distance.
For instance
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,
people
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 can stay connected even if their family lives in different countries, which allows them to
contact
Verb problem
communicate
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 through video calls and instant
messages
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messages,
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 gives a sense of convenience.
Secondly
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, they have revolutionised the way we work
,
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;
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for instance
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, employees can attend online meetings and video conferences from anywhere in the world.
Furthermore
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, they can manage a better work-
life
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 balance by having flexible work schedules
,
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apply
show examples
while
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 promoting their physical and mental well-being. In
conlcusion
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conclusion
,
although
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people
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 have differing opinions on the benefits and drawbacks of digitalisation, I believe that
life
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 has become less difficult with the help of technology. In my opinion,
such
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 innovations have brought a sense of convenience that could never
be
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
 imagined by our past generations.

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task response
Your answer makes a clear view and discusses both sides. Keep this clear in every paragraph.
task response
Give more precise examples and facts to back up points, and check the facts.
coherence cohesion
For coherence, start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and use linking words to show how ideas fit together.
coherence cohesion
Watch grammar: keep subject and verb to agree, fix spelling mistakes (like youngsters, conclusions).
coherence cohesion
Use simpler words and short sentences to fit the top 100 words rule and to be easy to read.
strength
Clear position on the issue in intro and conclusion.
strength
Balanced view with two sides.
strength
Good use of linking phrases to show flow.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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