The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.

The bar charts
illustate
Correct your spelling
illustrate
the information and the main reason for learning
over
Change preposition
among
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pupils from the age of under 20
upto
Use the right word
up to
show examples
over 49
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
they are receiving a certain amount of support from their employers.
To begin
Linking Words
with, a maximum of eighty students under 26 are studying for
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
, only 10 were learning for interest in their lives.
Additionally
Linking Words
, those from the age of 26 to 29,
less
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer
show examples
than 20 students were interested for interest studying, whilst about 70 pupils studied for their career.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, 30-39 of their age were observing the same mindset
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
shows that more
numbers
Check wording
apply
show examples
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
for career than for interest ones, accounting
67
Change preposition
for 67
show examples
and 25
respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, over sixty students below 26
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
received the maximum figure of support from their families.To add on,
this
Linking Words
was followed by 50 people ranging from 26
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to 29 years, they got their off
as well as
Linking Words
tuition from their employers.
Finally
Linking Words
, the least in
this
Linking Words
group was those from 30-39, since they got
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
minimum support from their parents
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
was approximately 34.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • age groups
  • career advancement
  • personal development
  • employer support
  • external aid
  • correlation
  • intrinsic motivation
  • career enhancement
  • societal impacts
  • workforce development
  • lifelong learning
  • primary reasons
  • motivation for study
  • part-time studies
  • career-oriented
  • personal interest
  • educational pursuit
  • study motivation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: