IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this becom a positive or negative development?

In
this
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 modern world, it has been claimed that there are
number
Correct article usage
a number
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 of
people
Use synonyms
 interacting with each other differently as compared to past years, and the reason why is
technogical
Correct your spelling
technological
 development. There are several
ways
Use synonyms
 in which types of relationships
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been affected, and it will be described in the
below paragraphs
Correct word order
paragraphs below
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. In my opinion,
this
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 has become a negative development.
People
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 prefer online interactions rather than meeting in person.
Besides
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 that, working for long hours through artificial intelligence has influenced society to use the technology for their personal meetings
also
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.
For example
Linking Words
, money has become extremely essential for
Use synonyms
people
Punctuation problem
people,
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that
Correct word choice
as
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realtionships
Correct your spelling
relationships
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 no value if compared to spending free
time
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 with loved ones. So, in terms of saving
time
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 for earning wealth, they have
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
 technological advancements like
face
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FaceTime
show examples
time
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, dating sites and
wats app
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WhatsApp
show examples
 video calls.
Thus
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, these are the
ways
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people
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 have
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
 in today's world in terms of communicating with one another.
Furthermore
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,
people
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 are relying on virtual connections more
instead
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 of being
into
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in
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 physical presence.
As a result
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, human touch has lost
as well
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as
Correct word choice
and
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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misunderstandings
has
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have
show examples
 taken space in
individual's
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an individual's
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 life.
For example
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, looking at each other on computers via several applications can never replace a feeling of meeting and spending
time
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 with each other physically because it will affect a long-term human bond in real life, and
this
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 is the reason
of upserge
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for the surge
 in
number
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the number
show examples
 of divorces in
this
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 era.
Thus
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, these are the
ways
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Change preposition
in where
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where
Correct word choice
which
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 bonds are affected, which
includes
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include
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higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 number of
seperations
Correct your spelling
separations
 and misunderstandings. In conclusion,
this
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 is only a negative development where
realtionships
Correct your spelling
relationships
 depend on virtual meetings via internet applications.
Additionaly
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Additionally
, it has affected the human bonds
also
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 in several
ways
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. The above examples in paragraphs clearly
states
Correct subject-verb agreement
state
show examples
 that
misunderstanding
Fix the agreement mistake
misunderstandings
show examples
 in
realtionships
Correct your spelling
relationships
 lead to
seperations
Correct your spelling
separations
 only.

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planning
Plan your essay first. Write a short intro that says your view and what you will say. Then add points in order, one by one.
content
Add more clear cause and effect. Show how technology changes a point, then how it leads to a result in life.
content
Use real examples. Try to explain why these changes are good or bad. Give enough detail for each point.
language
Check spelling and grammar. Fix common errors like 'realtionships' 'seperations' and 'upserge'.
coherence
Use linking words to connect ideas, such as 'first','also','however','for example' to guide the reader.
structure
End with a clear conclusion that sums up your view.
structure
The essay has an introduction and a conclusion.
content
Examples of online tools are given.
argument
A view is stated clearly.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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