IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Start now →
Introduction
There is no denying the fact that the study is very important to
enahance pepole
Correct your spelling
enhance people's
skills
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
while
Fix capitalization
While
show examples
 it is
commonly
Correct article usage
a commonly
show examples
 held belief that in many countries around the world the teenagers choose to join to
work
Use the right word
workforce
show examples
than
Rephrase
rather than
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
countnue thire highe
Correct your spelling
continue their higher
education
Use synonyms
,
Linking Words
also there is
Correct word order
there is also
show examples
un
Use the right word
an
show examples
 argument that some
peopl
Correct your spelling
people
 think
join
Wrong verb form
joining
show examples
 to
work
Check wording
workforce
show examples
 is more butter than
education
Use synonyms
 .
This
Linking Words
eassy
Correct your spelling
essay
 will analyse
this
Linking Words
 topic from both points of view and express my opinion.
Body · 1
On hand, improve your communication
skills
Use synonyms
.
In other words
Linking Words
, student can enhance their
skills
Use synonyms
 when they continue
Change preposition
in universties
show examples
universties
Correct your spelling
universities
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
studey
Correct your spelling
studying
 can help
studwnts
Correct your spelling
students
 to get international
jobs
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, student will get a real job
ands
Correct your spelling
and
 international
jobs
Use synonyms
 in big
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 around the world if
the
Use the right word
they
show examples
compleat
Correct your spelling
complete
 their
universty
Correct your spelling
university
.
Body · 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
join in
Wrong verb form
joining
show examples
 work
insteat
Correct your spelling
instead
study
Wrong verb form
of studying
show examples
 has many
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
. It is
posible
Correct your spelling
possible
 to say that people who
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
 not
cmpleated
Correct your spelling
completed
 his/her
highe
Correct your spelling
higher
education
Use synonyms
menas
Correct your spelling
means
 without any
skills
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, people who choose to
left
Wrong verb form
leave
show examples
 school had
limted
Correct your spelling
limited
 career growth.
For instance
Linking Words
, nations without
education
Use synonyms
menas witout
Correct your spelling
mean without
future
Correct article usage
a future
show examples
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 their
jobs
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
limtead
Correct your spelling
limited
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 they can not
improver
Replace the word
improve
show examples
 their job.
Conclusion
In
counclusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, there is no easy
answe
Correct your spelling
answer
 to
this
Linking Words
 question. In my
Correct your spelling
opinion
opioion
Add a comma
opioion,
show examples
 I consider that
education
Use synonyms
 is
extramly
Correct your spelling
extremely
 important in our
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 and future.
This
Linking Words
 is because everything in
nation's
Correct article usage
a nation's
show examples
 life
needed
Wrong verb form
needs
show examples
skills
Use synonyms
 and
Correct your spelling
learning
leran
Punctuation problem
leran,
show examples
 so
whiout
Correct your spelling
without
 them we
can no
Rephrase
cannot
show examples
 live . All in all , student should
completed
Wrong verb form
complete
show examples
 their
education
Use synonyms
 to
enhanch
Correct your spelling
enhance
 their
communicatin
Correct your spelling
communication
skills
Use synonyms
 and to get
internatinal
Correct your spelling
international
jobs
Use synonyms
 in a
wndeful
Correct your spelling
wonderful
 company .

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Check words and spell and use simple forms.
coherence
Put each idea in one part and make the link to next idea clear.
content
Give a real example for each idea so you show how it works.
lexical
Use short, easy sentences. Avoid long, hard words.
planning
Plan what you will write first and then write.
structure
Finish with a short end that restates your view.
content
The writer tries to discuss both sides of the issue.
perspective
The writer states a clear view.
structure
There is a sense of overall plan in the piece.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-based training
  • enrol
  • university
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • practical skills
  • experience
  • workforce
  • employment
  • earnings
  • opportunities
  • further education
  • theoretical knowledge
  • career options
  • exploitation
  • balance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: