IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people believe that employees should stay in the same job for the rest of their lives. Others think they should switch jobs at least once during their career. To what extent do you agree / disagree?

It is often argued that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 employees should be strictly fixed in the same occupation for their whole life.
While
Linking Words
 others think they should
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
should
Verb problem
apply
show examples
change the job once
atleast
Rephrase
apply
show examples
during their career. In my opinion,
these
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
both
perception
Fix the agreement mistake
perceptions
show examples
 can have
possitive
Correct your spelling
positive
 and negative impacts.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
possesing
Correct your spelling
possessing
 the same job
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
 of their lives can
more
Verb problem
bring more
show examples
 benefits in many ways.
one
Fix capitalization
One
show examples
 thing is
people
Correct word choice
that people
show examples
 can be professionalised in their same career.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , Job procedures
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 could be easier to
be done
Wrong verb form
do
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due to
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same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 people who deal with everyday.As an example, a person who works in a manufacturing factory
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 more
familier
Correct your spelling
familiar
 with their
equipments
Correct your spelling
equipment
, machines and their system.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they can
make
Verb problem
achieve
show examples
 a
big
Correct word choice
high
show examples
 productivity. As a
disadvantages
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
show examples
, financial stagnation is the worst impact of
this
Linking Words
. Not only that,
limited
Correct word choice
but limited
show examples
 skills
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and
obscelences
Correct your spelling
obscurities
.
In addition
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, there are advantages of having a change of
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
profession.
Initially
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,
accelerating
Wrong verb form
accelerates
show examples
 professional growth and
increasing
Wrong verb form
increases
show examples
 earning potential. There are some
drawbackes
Correct your spelling
drawbacks
 attached with
this
Linking Words
.That must be
effecting
Use the right word
affecting
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the reliability,
loyaltines
Correct your spelling
loyalty
 In
concluion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
Both
Fix capitalization
both
show examples
 views
got
Verb problem
have
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 lots of advantages and
disadvanges
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
.
According to
Linking Words
 my perception
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
,
change
Wrong verb form
changing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
carrer
Correct your spelling
career
 will
make
Verb problem
bring
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial stability
of
Change preposition
to
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 a person.
Linking Words
However
Punctuation problem
However,
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 both views have a
draw back
Use the right word
drawback
show examples
 because of
this
Linking Words
people
Punctuation problem
, people
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Should
Fix capitalization
should
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 make a decision by thinking of their future
endevients
Correct your spelling
endeavours

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coherence
Make your position clear from the start and keep it steady through the essay.
coherence
Use simple link words to join ideas, such as also, but, for example, and in addition.
planning
Put one main idea in each paragraph and back it with one short example.
grammar
Check spelling and grammar to clean up the writing.
content
The writer tries to cover both sides of the view.
content
An example from a factory is used to show life at work.
structure
There is an ending that tries to sum up the view.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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