IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Many people believe that countries shouldproduce food for all population and import as littleas possible.To what extent do you agree ordisagree?

In recent years, the issue of whether a country
cut
Wrong verb form
cuts
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 down on
food
Use synonyms
 imports as much as possible to achieve full independence in
food
Use synonyms
 production has sparked heated debate. From my perspective, I totally strongly disagree with the idea that . Some people think
Use synonyms
countries
Correct word choice
that countries
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produce
Wrong verb form
producing
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food
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 for all population is reasonable, which can better match people’s appetite.
However
Linking Words
, more people enjoy trying different kinds
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food
Change preposition
of food
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 that
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result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
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 in imported
food
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 being more expensive.
That is
Linking Words
 why rare things are more expensive.
For example
Linking Words
, there
hardly
Verb problem
are hardly
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 produce avocados
and
Verb problem
produced and
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much
Fix the agreement mistake
many
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 people like eating them in my country, which
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result
Correct subject-verb agreement
results
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 in the price being more expensive.
As a
Linking Words
result
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,.....
Furthermore
Linking Words
, another compelling argument in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
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 of
this
Linking Words
 view is that
countries
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 need to correctly import
food
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 for their own nations. Because
food
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 is an important
carry
Check wording
carrier
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 of a country’s culture,
therefore
Linking Words
, it is a vital way
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
culture
Replace the word
cultural
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 exchange for imported
food
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. The development of every nation cannot do without cultural diversity
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 importing foreign
food
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 can push cross-cultural communication
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
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 domestic
food
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 production cannot achieve
.
Correct pronoun usage
this.
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Thus
Linking Words
,
countries
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 should not excessively cut down on
food
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 imports.
For example
Linking Words
, China holds international
food
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 and culture exchange exhibitions every year, which
makes
Verb problem
allows
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 us to learn
different
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about different
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countries
Use synonyms
’ cultures.
As a
Linking Words
result
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..... In conclusion, I firmly believe that all
countries
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 need to correctly
impost
Use the right word
impose
show examples
food
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. Only by doing so can we taste a wide variety of foods and enjoy reasonable prices for them.  What is more, we can learn
different
Change preposition
about different
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
’ cultures
knowledge
Check wording
apply
show examples
.

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task
Your view is clear, but the task needs more full answer. Say if you agree or disagree in one line and stay with it. Add a short plan in the first paragraph.
coherence
Link ideas better. Use one idea per paragraph. Start each paragraph with a point sentence that tells the idea. Use simple links such as First, Also, But, So.
language
Grammar and spelling need work. Watch the use of articles (a/the), plural form, and verb tenses. Short, simple sentences are safer.
strength
You show a clear position that you disagree with the plan.
strength
You try to give examples and reasons.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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