IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The line graph show the average number of weekly patients visiting for clinic of a hospital from 2010 to 2016.

The line graph illustrates the average
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of weekly
patients
Use synonyms
 visiting birth control, eye, dental and diabetic clinics from 2010 to 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the highest
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
patients
Use synonyms
 was
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
eye
Correct article usage
the eye
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clinic
Use synonyms
 throughout the period,
while
Linking Words
dental
Correct article usage
the dental
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clinic
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
patients were
Verb problem
had
show examples
 the
least
Correct word choice
fewest
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.
diabetic
Correct article usage
The diabetic
show examples
clinic
Use synonyms
 was increased gradually
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 dental
show
Replace the word
showed
show examples
 little change.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
eye
Correct article usage
the eye
show examples
clinic
Use synonyms
 started
with150
Correct your spelling
with 150
patients
Use synonyms
 in
2010
Punctuation problem
2010,
show examples
then
Linking Words
 increased significantly to 350 in 2016,
whereas
Linking Words
birth
Correct article usage
the birth
show examples
 control
started
Check wording
clinic started
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 with 250
patients
Use synonyms
 in 2010 and
was remain
Wrong verb form
remained
show examples
 unstable until the end of
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
.
Linking Words
on
Fix capitalization
On
show examples
 the other hand,
diabetic
Correct article usage
the diabetic
show examples
clinic
Use synonyms
was
Verb problem
had
show examples
 the lowest
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
patients
Punctuation problem
patients,
show examples
start
Wrong verb form
starting
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 from about 55
patients
Use synonyms
 and
end
Wrong verb form
ending
show examples
 with 180.
dental
Correct article usage
The dental
show examples
clinic
Use synonyms
 was stable and rose gradually from 100 to about 130
patients
Use synonyms
.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words patients, clinic with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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