IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

International tourism has become a huge industry in the world. It has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the problems of international tourism outweigh its advantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Historically, global travel has become a colossal industry
in
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apply
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the
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apply
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worldwide.
However
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,
while
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 international visitors travel, they
catalyze
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catalyse
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 financial dividends to many places. At the same time, they raise grave concerns about the impact on
host
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communities
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 and the environment by tourists. even though it looks like a double-edged sword. In my view, despite the environmental challenges, the socio-economic benefits of tourism ultimately outweigh its drawbacks. provided that effective mitigation strategies are implemented.
To begin
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 with,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 of International Tourism
revolusionized
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revolutionised
paradigm
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the paradigm
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 for economic growth and job creation.
For example
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, tourist expenditures have a pervasive impact on locals, hotels, transport, and local enterprises. At the same time, employment opportunities are integrated into the workforce.
Furthermore
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, the infrastructure and cultural exchange are foundational pillars,
such
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 as improved roads, airports, global awareness, and cultural understanding. These are important components of a country.
cultural
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Cultural
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 exchanges
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this
Correct determiner usage
apply
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fosters
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foster
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 a sense of intercultural appreciation in
host
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communities
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.
Conversly
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Conversely
, the unregulated expansion of international tourism significantly undermines both ecological integrity and local stability. Environmental degradation, manifested through systemic pollution, the destruction of natural habitats, and the depletion of finite resources, poses a grave threat to biodiversity.
Furthermore
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,
host
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communities
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 often endure adverse socio-economic impacts,
such
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 as chronic overcrowding and the erosion of indigenous culture. These factors contribute to inflated costs of living, making essential goods and transportation increasingly unaffordable for the local populace. In conclusion, tourists are important to economies and
host
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communities
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 because of the economic reliance that
host
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communities
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 have on overseas visitors.
Furthermore
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, in order to safeguard environments destroyed by tourists, governments should have policy frameworks to limit tourist numbers in each area. Ultimately, a harmonious balance between economic gain and environmental preservation is essential for long-term sustainability.

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improvement
Use short, clear sentences and check grammar, so ideas are easy to follow.
structure
Each paragraph should have one main idea shown in a clear opening sentence.
linking
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, but, however, finally to show flow.
content
Give more real examples or facts to back what you say.
length
Keep paragraphs to one idea and cut long or hard words that may confuse.
stance
The writer shows a clear view that benefits can be bigger than problems.
balance
The piece covers both sides and notes the need to manage impact.
policy
The ending asks for a plan to guard nature while welcoming visitors.
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