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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many workplaces, creativity and imagination are becoming more valued than technical expertise. Why is this the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

These days, it can be commonly observed that creativity has increased in demand in workplaces,
while
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 professional competence ranked second.
This
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 may happen
as a consequence
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 of the growing number of
Al
Use the right word
AI
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 users and decline in business advancement. I am convinced that these circumstances may have a positive transformation, since the development of
population's
Correct article usage
the population's
show examples
 critical thinking and their career prospects. One significant reason behind
this
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 is the rapid integration of Artificial Intelligence into professional fields. The more public use it, the more competitive the job market will become. A good illustration of
that is
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 the media and journalism sphere, which requires a stable stream of fresh ideas to hold Gen-Z's attention,
while
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 Al can provide a limited amount of creative output, resulting in raised demand for individuals' innovative mindsets.
Secondly
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, the decrease in companies' performance influences the workforce. If the company experiences an improvement shortage, it will be in need of people who can change the progress strategy, establishing imaginative approaches.
Hence
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, both Artificial Intelligence and business transformation affect job market requirements.
This
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 tendency seems to be positive, since it improves critical thinking. People start adopting a problem-solving mindset in order to boost creativity. To illustrate, individuals establish personal projects in order to be noticed and demonstrate both their uniqueness and the level of
a
Correct article usage
apply
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specialisation.
Moreover
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, career opportunities appear. Because of the high requirements in the job field, human beings polish all their skills and become more competitive, which leads to
further
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 promotions.
Consequently
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, not only do critical aspects develop, but
also
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 professional growth potential arises. In conclusion, the necessity of imaginative thinkers
instead
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 of just technical masters has appeared
due to
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 the
usage
Check wording
use
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 of
Al
Use the right word
AI
show examples
 and the lack of business development.
Nevertheless
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, from my point of view, people are
benefiters
Check wording
the beneficiaries
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.

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task response
The essay has a clear view but looks at one side. To raise the score, say clearly if you think it is good or bad at the end and add a small note on a balance view.
coherence
Use a clear plan: start with a short intro that shows your point, then 2 or 3 ideas in body, then a short conclusion that restates your view.
cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, next, also, but, so. Keep ideas in one part and make the next idea start in a new paragraph.
grammar
Fix small mistakes: use AI for Artificial Intelligence (not 'Al'), keep one spelling, and use simple grammar.
lexical resource
Give one or two real examples from jobs to show your point and avoid long or hard words.
strength
The writer shows a clear view that creativity is in demand and wants to use AI.
strength
There are good ideas and some examples of work life.
strength
There are link words that help flow.
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