IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays more and more people have to compete with young people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause and what are the possible solutions?

These days
many
Punctuation problem
, many
show examples
 old
people
Use synonyms
 are competing with youngsters for similar
work
Use synonyms
position
Fix the agreement mistake
positions
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. It causes increased unemployment and
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
 organisational
overall
Linking Words
 efficiency
due to
Linking Words
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of
less
Correct article usage
a less
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 experienced workforce. But
this
Linking Words
 problem can be solved by providing certain
job
Use synonyms
reservation
Fix the agreement mistake
reservations
show examples
 and
trainings
Use the right word
training
show examples
 to elderly employees. First of all, many companies prefer to hire young
people
Use synonyms
 over
old
Correct word choice
older
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, because they are willing to
work
Use synonyms
 at lower salaries and are more familiar with the new technology than their
old
Correct word choice
older
show examples
 counterparts.
For example
Linking Words
, in India, many aged individuals are facing challenges
to find
Change preposition
in finding
show examples
 jobs after being replaced by young applicants.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
 leads to workplace tension, as young employee easily adapts to technology than
old
Use the right word
older
show examples
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
, and
this
Linking Words
 generational gap leads to low productivity and efficiency. To tackle
such
Linking Words
kind
Check wording
apply
show examples
of
job
Use synonyms
-related problem,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and communities can take several measures. Like,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 can set
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
show examples
 number of
job
Use synonyms
position
Fix the agreement mistake
positions
show examples
 reserved for old
people
Use synonyms
. So, they will not struggle to find a
job
Use synonyms
.
Additional
Replace the word
Additionally
show examples
, organisations should provide retraining programmes
particularly
Punctuation problem
, particularly
show examples
 designed for older
people
Use synonyms
, to help them
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
adapt to new technology and
Use synonyms
work
Correct article usage
the work
show examples
 environment.
For example
Linking Words
,
digital
Correct article usage
a digital
show examples
 literacy course helps them to learn about new technological advancements. In conclusion, increasing competition among young and old
people
Use synonyms
 for
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
job
Use synonyms
 is increasing
unemployment
Correct article usage
the unemployment
show examples
 rate
in
Change preposition
among
show examples
 senior workers and reducing
work
Use synonyms
 productivity. But
can
Correct pronoun usage
it can
show examples
 be solved, if authorities and employers take suitable actions, like reserving
job
Use synonyms
 positions for
old
Correct word choice
older
show examples
 individuals and by offering training courses at
organisational
Correct article usage
the organisational
show examples
 level.

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task response
Add more detail to each problem and fix. Show how each fix can help many people.
coherence
Make the flow clear: add a short intro, then 3 body parts, then a short end.
language
Use simple and correct grammar. Check plural and verb form.
examples
Give more good examples and numbers. This can show how the fix helps.
content
The idea is clear: there is a problem with old and young workers.
structure
There is a final line that sums up the idea.
examples
Examples like India are used to show the thing.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Personal fulfillment
  • Unfulfilling job
  • Mental health
  • Physical health
  • Financial stability
  • Job security
  • Societal norms
  • Career choices
  • Pursuing passion
  • Practicality
  • Personal growth
  • Skill development
  • Self-esteem
  • Social status
  • Work-life balance
What to do next:
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