Museums and art galleries should concentrate on works that show history and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Most
people
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think that attractive places
such
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as art galleries and
museums
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should only pay attention to their own conventional master pieces than foreign cultures. I partially disagree with that statement, because other
countries
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countries'
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manuscripts are essential for them in terms of mindset,
in other
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words
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words,
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it helps
people
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to broaden their horizons. These days,
museums
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are visited mostly by school students or other individuals. As young
people
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have no idea how ancient
people
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in their countries
had
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apply
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lived, and
how
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what
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their lifestyle was.
Museums
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do favor
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provide a way
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for them to quickly understand the main point of those traditions, and it is better than any textbooks, because it
illustrated
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illustrates
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the exact
visualization
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visualisation
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of them. Another key point is that these historical records maintain
county’s
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the county’s
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own identity and
helps
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help
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to prolong their reputation by sharing
to
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with
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new generations.
As a result
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, one nation’s identity will be preserved for the next 1000 years.
Scientist
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Scientists
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prove that current well-preserved historical archives can
last
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up to another 1000 years, so these historical records
can
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apply
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will be seen by another 10 centuries.
On the other hand
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, only concentrating on a country’s own traditions is not always efficient, as
museums
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also
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play an important role in broadening
people
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’s perspectives. Displaying manuscripts, artworks, and historical objects from other parts of the world allows visitors to learn about different
civilizations
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civilisations
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, beliefs, and ways of life.
This
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exposure helps individuals develop a more open mindset and a deeper understanding of global history, rather than viewing the world from a narrow national perspective.
In addition
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, international collections enable meaningful comparisons between cultures.
For instance
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, visitors can observe how scientific knowledge, art styles, or philosophical ideas have evolved differently across societies,
while
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still influencing one another.
This
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not only enhances critical thinking but
also
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highlights the interconnected nature of human development.
As a result
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,
museums
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that include global works tend to be more educational and appealing to a wider audience, including tourists. In conclusion,
although
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museums
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and art galleries should prioritise preserving and showcasing their own country’s history and culture, it is unreasonable to exclude works from other parts of the world. A balanced approach, where national heritage is given primary importance
while
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international artefacts are
also
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displayed, is the most effective way to educate the public and promote cultural understanding.

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improvement
Stick to one main idea per paragraph and tie each paragraph to your view.
improvement
Use simple linking words like 'also', 'but', 'for example' to show how ideas go with each other.
improvement
Be clear about your stance in the first paragraph and restate it in the conclusion.
improvement
Check small grammar errors and word form so sentences make sense and easy to read.
strength
The essay shows a real view and talks about both sides.
strength
Intro, body, and conclusion are clear.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • history
  • culture
  • country
  • world
  • own
  • local
  • national
  • art
  • museum
  • gallery
  • show
  • display
  • learn
  • teach
  • people
  • visitors
  • tourists
  • plan
  • balance
  • loan
  • idea
  • value
  • future
  • time
  • money
  • space
  • access
  • open
  • share
  • exchange
  • connect
  • difference
  • similarity
  • heritage
  • tradition
  • identity
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