IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Is it appropriate for students and teachers to be friends on Facebook? How much do you agree with the opinion and why? Give reasons and examples to support it.

Social media like
Facebook
Use synonyms
 is
also
Linking Words
 another communication channel that
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 and
teachers
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 could be connected. I agreed that it is appropriate for
students
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 and
teachers
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 to connect on
Facebook
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
reasons
Correct article usage
the reasons
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 below.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
Facebook
Use synonyms
 is the online community
that is
Linking Words
 general for the modern world today. Not only
teachers
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 and
students
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,
many
Correct word choice
but many
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 people
also
Linking Words
 use
Facebook
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 as a tool to express identity and opinions
same
Punctuation problem
, same
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 as in school and other channels. To be friends
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Facebook
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
does
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 not
destroying
Wrong verb form
destroy
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 the relationship or respect of the
students
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 and
teachers
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but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 it strengthens the understanding between each other
that
Correct word choice
so that
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 they
could
Wrong verb form
can
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 clearly share interests together.
Secondly
Linking Words
, respect or disrespect is dependent on
person
Correct article usage
the person
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 themselves
not
Punctuation problem
, not
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platform
Correct article usage
the platform
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.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
Facebook
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 is the place where people
could
Wrong verb form
can
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 share posts freely
including
Punctuation problem
, including
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 inappropriate
post
Fix the agreement mistake
posts
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,
teachers
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 and
students
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 should reflect
themselves
Change preposition
on themselves
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 in the appropriate way. In conclusion,
teachers
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 and
students
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 could connect to each other on
Facebook
Use synonyms
 since it is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 common platform to communicate and express their perspectives. If it is related to the inappropriate content, it was not because of the platform but the persons themselves.
That is
Linking Words
 the
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
 why I agreed with
this
Linking Words
 topic.

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task response
Add a clear view in the intro and say why you agree. In the body, give at least one real example from school life and explain how it shows your point.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in each paragraph with simple words. One main idea per paragraph. Use words like First, Next, Then, Finally to show order.
grammar and lexis
Check grammar and spellings. Use short, clean sentences. Use the same form for verbs and keep nouns plural when needed.
task response
The writer states a clear position.
structure
There is an introduction, body and conclusion.
coherence
Connectors such as First/Next/Finally help show order.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Boundary
  • Professionalism
  • Privacy concerns
  • Dynamics
  • Favoritism
  • Bias
  • Objectivity
  • Tailored educational experience
  • Approachable
  • Legislation
  • Guidelines
  • Complexities
  • Best practices
What to do next:
Look at other essays: